Redemption
by Crimson Mooon
Summary: Rufus Shinra would never be a hero. He was a cynical, spiteful and selfish human being. But after missing for three years and finally returning to the public eye, everyone can't helped but he shocked. Rufus Shinra didn't act like a president, he acted more like his Turks, or a member of AVALANCHE. What happened?
1. Chapter 1:  Everything Changes

_This is the new edited version. I have changed a few things, and the ending of this chapter is almost completely different than the old version. I would still read through each chapter just to make sure because I have gone through and changed a lot of things. I am still currently editing other chapter but I promise that I am not going to abandon this story, I will be updating every week at some point, maybe even more so then that._

_ If you are a new reader, then what I said doesn't really matter._

_Reviews are always welcome and wanted. Please don't flame because this is fanfiction, if you don't like the idea then don't read._

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter One – Everything Changes

Though it was a few years later, he could still remember the exact way it had all occurred. It had happened very fast but looking back it seemed that time was barely moving. It had been a mid December evening with snow falling gently from the white sky. Overall, it had been a very beautiful day – there were people Christmas shopping and children playing in the snow. There was no indication that some horrific event would occur.

Horrific to some people, most people didn't care though. Everyone was surprised, but it wasn't a surprise that sent them into a panic. It was a surprise that made them wonder how something like _that _could happen to someone like _him._

No one could believe that someone had actually kidnapped the infamous Rufus Shinra. The man who had helped destroy the planet and the man who was actually sorry for it. The man who hated his father but had sincerely loved his mother. The man who had controlled the planet with fear, and still controlled people with the same methods. The man who funded the WRO and became Vice President when it was least expected. The cocky, unemotional, cynical bastard who had never experienced real pain aside from Geostigma. The man who still bossed the Turks around and went to the Seventh Heaven in Edge just to bother AVALANCHE. The man that the planet hated, but gave a second chance to.

He had been filling out some paper work that Reeve had given him. It was on the reconstruction of Midgar, which he found completely amusing. He didn't believe the city could be rebuilt, but he wasn't going to try and stop them. He had a phone attached to his ear and a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. He and Tseng were discussing the reconstruction of Sector 5, and what to do with the small church.

"Sir, what should be done with the church?" Tseng asked from the other side of the line. There was a small amount of sorrow in his voice that would have been undetectable to anyone else but Rufus. He knew that Tseng had a soft spot for the Cetra girl, but that was only because he had to watch over her for the 4 years that Zack was gone.

"What about it?" Rufus said as he took a drag of his cigarette. He didn't really care about the church, because he hadn't cared about that girl at all, she was just something that he had used and other than what he needed her for, she held no other purpose.

Three years had passed since the Deep Ground incident and since then Rufus hadn't really changed. He still wore a white suit, but instead of wearing a three peace he wore a normal two piece with a black dress shirt. His hair was still slicked back, and his green eyes still burned with power and authority. He was now the Vice President of the WRO, which is something that he found more sick than amusing.

"Do you want us to tear it down, or repair it then rebuild around it?" Tseng's voice broke through the small thoughts that Rufus was having and there was a little impatience in his tone.

"I don't really care." He answered blankly, smashing the small bud into the ash tray then leaning back in his seat, " I suppose rebuilding it and then working around it would be more logical. If anything where to happen to it AVALANCE would most likely organize an attack on us." He let his thoughts stray to the small group then sighed. Just the thought of them made him exhausted. He loved to go annoy them, but thinking of them against each other again made him cringe.

"I understand." The Turk answered. His voice held no conversation as usual. Trying to talk to Tseng was pointless because he was a workaholic and he would much rather be following some orders, than interacting with people. "I'll report when needed."

The line went dead without warning and Rufus closed his phone then tossed it onto his desk. He spun his chair around to look out the huge window behind him. He admired the snow with a small smile then reflected on some memories that he hadn't thought of in years. He remembered he and his mother playing outside until they were red in the nose and they couldn't feel their fingers.

She had told him that the snow was like a child, it was pure and innocent. She had always said things like that. She said the moon was the earth's Guardian Angel, and when it was raining the heaven's were weeping. She said that when people smiled that the sun would show itself, and when people frowned it was cloudy. There was nothing she couldn't explain.

She had been beautiful. Her hair was blonde and wavy, coming down to the small of her back. Her eyes had been a gentle green that Rufus had inherited as a child. Her smile was always warm and welcoming. She had always had a loving nature about her, whenever she could she would hold out a helping hand. She had rocked Rufus to sleep when he was sick and when he had nightmares. When his father would ignore him, she always made sure to be there instead. She showed him nothing more than unconditional love.

She began to grow sick when he was six. The color from her face was drained and her hair lost some of it's pigment. She was very weak, and couldn't walk too far. She started to spend more time in her bed than anywhere else. Finally, when she couldn't even leave her bed, Rufus's father told him that she was too sick be around, and that he couldn't go near her. He always ignored the warning and would sneak in her room at night when everyone else was asleep. Her smile never faded when he would arrive, and her eyes still shone with love that they always had.

She died when he was eight.

Rufus cried for a week straight, and for that week it rained nonstop.

He shook his head, getting rid of the thoughts. It had been a very long time since he thought about his mother, but on days like that he couldn't help it. The snow was his most clear memory of her. He had become accustomed to pushing thoughts of her away, because it was the only thing that could make him upset. Even though it had been years later, and he wasn't eight years old anymore, he still felt like a child when he thought about her.

It was in that moment that everything changed. The second he let his mind tangle up in his past that he barely ever acknowledged. It all seemed to happen in slow motion, but the actual event couldn't have lasted more than a few seconds. There was no time for yelling or screaming, or anything of the sort. All means of escape were gone.

The window shattered suddenly in front of him and before he could even comprehend what was happening, or even think about saving himself he was thrown against the wall and pinned with his arms behind his back and his legs forced to stay still. There was a hand dressed in leather over his mouth, and when he looked at who was holding him he was greeted to a unique pair of eyes.

Glowing light blue eyes. The pupil was small in the center and it seemed that they reflected all of the misery and guilt that Rufus possessed. It was almost like the eyes looked right through him and the ability to show him the emotions that he suppressed or didn't even know he had.

"Rufus Shinra." They said, they're voice was gruff and low, which reminded Rufus of Vincent Valentine. "There is no mistaking it." He murmured looking him over and staring at his eyes for a few moments. "You have the eyes, they're just a little more mature since the last time I saw you."

Rufus continued to thrash about, trying his best to get away from his capture. He could hear footsteps coming toward his office and it was then that he wanted to smirk at the person in victory. But whoever had pinned him against the wall murmured something under their breath, and before Rufus knew what was going on his eyes closed involuntarily. Suddenly everything went black, and his senses were dulled. He was in a conscious state of mind, but everything else was gone; he was left with his thoughts.

The last thing he could remember though, was a pair of glowing yellow eyes that seemed to know him better than he knew himself.

* * *

He was sitting at a bar now, shaking his head riding of the memory of that day three years ago. He had been contemplating on whether or not to go do the mission he had been sent on, which had led him to think about that day once again. So much had changed in the past three years that he didn't know whether or not he really cared anymore. His life and been thrown upside down, but it wasn't like it was the first time.

He slowly took a sip of his drink and observed the people around him. Everyone was laughing, drinking and enjoying themselves. Drunken men were hitting on the sleazy women, who acted like they were disgusted but loved every second of it. He observed everyone closely, but not enough to draw attention to himself. He was slightly reminded of the Seventh Heaven back in Edge, and was a little disappointed he wasn't there. He waved the bar tender over, deciding he would have one more drink before he set out on his mission.

"What can I get you?" The man said a little too cheerily, Rufus looked up at him and decided that he liked him. Only because he had a scar across his right eye, and his cheery tone had been sarcastic. He was giving Rufus a small glare, as if he really wanted him to leave his bar.

"Scotch." He said evenly. The man nodded and poured him a glass and set it in front of him, then quickly walking away to a group of drunken men who seemed to be trying to pick up a group of girls, who were obviously underage, but everyone seemed to ignore the fact. He turned his attention to his drink, deciding that he was going to take his time. He really didn't feel like doing anything else. He tried to fill his mind with the thoughts of how he was going to tell the "Organization" he was leaving. He did his part, after tonight they didn't 'own' him anymore.

His white suit had been discarded long ago. He now wore a black turtle neck with a black leather jacket, his black jeans hung loosely around his hips and it wasn't a surprise no one recognized him. He didn't look anything like the Vice President of the WRO, or the President of Shinra. He looked like a punk. His hair was messy, instead of being slicked back. His holster hung around his hips, two guns on either side, while his daggers were strapped to his thighs.

Rufus Shinra looked more like his Turks or a member of AVALANCHE.

His eyes stayed the same though. The same green as his mothers, though they didn't hold the gentleness and the love that hers had. His were cold and clouded; they held a mystery about them and an authority. They were like sharp daggers, people either shied away from them or didn't want to look away.

He glanced over at a man who had been staring at him for too long and slightly narrowed his eyes at him. The man seemed unaffected and walked over and sat down beside the ex President with a smirk on his face.

"You look a lot like Rufus Shinra." The man commented, he had a bit of a Country accent and Rufus was reminded of Cid Highwind. When he didn't answer the man continued, "The man's been missing for three years now. Can't help but wonder where the bastard is, I heard he was funding the WRO until his disappearance."

"He had just become the Vice President." Rufus commented, taking a sip of his drink. Slightly uneasy about talking about himself.

"Oh yeah." The man said offhandedly, lighting a cigarette. It was quiet for a few minutes, almost like there was something that was going unsaid. The man broke the silence after taking a drag of his cigarette, and he held it between his fingers loosely. "So, how've ya been? You've been missing for three years now." Rufus froze, he wasn't sure what to do. He wasn't sure if he should actually tell someone who he was, but he did know that he wasn't going to lie. If someone knew then they knew.

"Life's changed." He said, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it with ease. He didn't really feel any different with someone knowing that he was the missing Rufus Shinra. He still felt empty and numb. He still felt like he wanted to die.

"I heard you were kidnapped, or something like that." The man said taking the cigarette out of his mouth and downing the rest of his beer. "By the way, the names Charles."

"Yeah, something like that." Rufus said then taking a drag of his cigarette.

"People think your dead." Charles commented, seeming a little bored.

"Let them think what they want, it doesn't matter to me."

"You're not like they said you were."

Rufus put out his cigarette then turned his attention back to his neglected drink, "I'm not?" He asked, a little curious to what that meant.

"They said you were stuck up, and hot headed."

"I am." Rufus countered, not at all ashamed of who he was, "Who's they?" He asked, not really caring if he got an actual answer.

"The WRO."

"You work for them?"

"No, my cousin does. Cid Highwind." He grinned at the ex President, "Cid said you were nothing without those Turks of yours, or your company."

"He's right. I'm not much without it." He said bored. It was true, He wasn't much without Shinra, or the WRO. He was just a regular man, but over the course of three years he got pretty used to that. "But I've became accustomed to not being much anymore."

"I kinda like you." Charles said grinning, he looked at Rufus and chuckled. "I won't tell anyone I saw you."

"Don't do me any favors." Rufus said as Charles stood up, leaving some money on the counter, "Tell anyone you want. I don't care."

Charles said nothing else but walked away. Rufus heard the front door of the bar open and close with a small slam and he smirked to himself, things were about to get much more interesting. He sighed then downed the rest of his drink, setting the glass on the table and lighting one more cigarette and not even finishing half of it before he slammed it in the glass ash tray in front of him.

He set some money on the counter then hopped off the bar stool. He made his way through the small crowd that had formed because of the new music that was playing, people were dancing, or attempting to dance. Most people couldn't even stand up straight, let alone dance. He finally reached the door and pushed it open, relishing in the feeling of finally being out of the small overcrowded bar.

As he walked down the steps and down the sidewalk he could still hear the music blaring, the lights were pouring through the windows, lighting up the sidewalk. It was a quiet night, the street lights were on with the moon blocked by the dark clouds. There were few people out and about, they were mainly teenagers out past curfew or prostitutes. There were a few stores that were open, and the only car that passed him as he walked through the small city was a bus going to Edge.

He wanted to get on that bus more than anything.

As he turned a corner he put his right hand behind him and drew out a pair of leather gloves from his back pocket. He slipped them on slowly, staring at the scars on his hands that he had acquired over the past three and a half years.

He walked down a small alley, which held no lamp post. He was thankful for his mako enhanced vision because it was the only thing that was allowing him to see. He yanked his gun from his right hip and walked over to a small trash bin. There was a door there which was already open. He slipped in and was greeted to a small flight of stairs. He walked down them slowly, trying to listen to his surroundings.

He could hear them laughing, and he sighed. The clinking of beer bottles and the smell of cigars were evident, and it occurred to him that they didn't expect a single thing to happen. They expected to go to sleep tonight and get up tomorrow and go about their business.

But they weren't. Tonight was their last night. They would no longer be breathing after tonight. Their heart would stop beating tonight. They ended tonight.

He expected their to be at least five or six, depending if all of them were there or not. Slowly he pushed himself off the wall and shot at whatever was directly in front of him, and he was greeted to a man playing pool with a cigarette dangling out of his mouth. The bullet shot him in the neck before he could even react to the sound of the gun going off, and he fell to the ground with a hard thump, causing everyone else in the room to either freeze or act fast.

One of the men threw a pool stick at Rufus, and he quickly caught it and catapulted it toward whoever had thrown it. It hit them in the left eye and before anyone could have a real reaction Rufus was already in the room hiding behind a table he had thrown on it's side.

Being "trained" for three years, he had learned quite a lot. He could listen to things closely and know what was going on without seeing it. He heard someone take a ragged breath and he quickly shot in that direction.

That was all he really did, was listen to where they were taking a step and their breathing. He killed all of them with ease, finding that he was left with the feeling of emptiness once again. He stood up and looked over his surroundings, there was so much blood that it began to give him a headache. So much blood flowing away from them, that it seemed that it was their life slowly drifting away.

"So they sent you."

Rufus spun around on his heel and stared at the man who was leaning on the entrance doorway. His brown hair was tied back into a ponytail, that sometimes reminded the ex president of his old Turk. Blue eyes stared back at him along with a smirk, "Can't say I'm surprised though, since you're the best." He sighed then chuckled lightly, "Hard to believe though right? Rufus Shinra the man who -"

"I don't need to be reminded of my past. I know it very well actually." He said with a small glare, he stared at the man almost like he was trying to tell him something without actual words. "Miles," His voice was suddenly somewhat pained, and it seemed like this was more than just a regular mission. This man was more than just the regular kill, he was something more. "Don't make me do this." He sounded almost desperate, and it was something that he fully couldn't understand.

The other man clicked his tongue and tapped his chin, "_I'm_ not making you do anything. I'm merely sitting here attempting to have a conversation with you, now-" He said as he gestured to the whole room, "I'd invite you to sit, but it seems that the whole floor is almost covered in blood."

"Miles-"

"Now, they never said that you weren't aloud to have a conversation with me, they said to take me back to them or kill me. They never said when or where." He smiled, almost like talking about his death was of no importance. He waved Rufus over, "Let's walk. I already know how tonight will end, I just want to say a few things before it happens."

Rufus stared at Miles with uncertain eyes then shook his head, "I can't control when it happens."

"There are a certain set of words you'll say concerning the fact, that's when it triggers. I already know everything, I didn't leave without doing research." Miles said nonchalant, he headed for the stairs and sighed when Rufus didn't move. "Rufus Shinra, if you want any form of faith ever again you'll follow me."

The ex President stared at the other man with a confused gaze and slowly holstered his gun and dragged his feet to follow Miles. He wasn't sure what to expect, he just knew that now he was afraid to talk, now that he knew there was a certain pair of words that he had to say in order for the trigger to work.

They walked up the stairs in silence, but Rufus knew that whatever Miles had to say was important. When they finally reached the alleyway Miles turned around stared intensely, his arms were crossed and it was almost like he was critiquing Rufus's every move.

"You can beat them." He finally said, never averting his eyes. "I don't want you to open your mouth once because when I'm done, I'm going to be done for good. I know what will happen, and I can't run anymore. I'm tired of running to save my life, it's not worth it. If I can't live my life the way I want to, then I don't want it. I've fought for years, for me, for you, for everyone in there. I've tried and tried to find a way and I finally have. I've found a way to beat them, I've found a way to free all of them."

Rufus stared with a pained expression because he knew what was now going to happen after this talk was over He would never admit it out loud but Miles was his best friend. He had been the one to save his life countless times when everything started. That was his partner, his helper, his friend. That was basically his brother.

"You have to promise me that you wont go back there – I mean it. You have to fight it Rufus because if I can, I _know_ you can. There is no doubt in my mind that you'll set yourself free, but it wont be right now. You wont be able to fight this last impulse, it's to strong, they set it like that on purpose." Miles took a deep breath and it was suddenly clear to Rufus that he was scared. He had never seen Miles so talkative or serious since he had known him, and he could see the fear in his eyes.

Seeing Miles terrified killed Rufus on the inside.

"You know what the trigger is and what it does; It makes you do whatever they want. It's a chip that they implant in your brain that makes you have powerful impulses that you usually cannot fight. If they tell you to kiss their shoes, you kiss their shoes and you can't stop yourself – you can try and then electrifying pain goes pulses through you. We've all been there, we know that..." He trailed off then ran a hand through his hair, sighing quietly then casting his gaze to the ground, "Except sometimes we break the connection, it's rare but we can do it if we set our minds to it. Example one being me."

"We all know who controls this connection – there's no need to say his name. They have a machine that controls all the chips..." He shook his head then quickly locked his eyes with Rufus, "We have to kill him, and destroy that machine."

Rufus said nothing but nodded, he was determined not to say a word because maybe if he didn't say anything at all there would be no need to kill the man I front of him, maybe he could just walk away and then just fight the connection...

Fat chance.

"Rufus – say something."

He shook his head.

"You have to."

He shook his head again.

"Rufus – there is no way you can fight this. You _will_ kill me, because I'm not going back there. I don't want to go back there, you have to think about this. They'll be chasing me until they either kill me or until they can drag me back there. I don't want to be dragged back, I rather die and I rather die by your hand than theirs." Miles was now staring at the ground, which gave Rufus the impression that he didn't mean half of the things he was saying.

Rufus knew that no matter what happened, tonight was going to end badly. Just knowing that though wasn't enough to stop him from trying. He finally found something to say, he just hoped that it wouldn't invoke the impulse – he prayed. "I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of, I've killed people, kidnapped them – I've helped create this world we now live in. I've helped ruin lives and end them..." He tried to keep his voice even, which was something he was usually good at, except he was talking to the _one_ person he now looked up. He was talking to someone who actually meant something to him, and that honestly didn't happen often. It was rare when Rufus Shinra cared about someone. "The one thing they cannot make me do is kill my brother. If you go, I go too."

Miles stared at him confused, almost as if he didn't understand the words that had just been spoken. Rufus slowly took a step back, then shook his head slightly. "I'll be damned." He mumbled as he turned on his heel and started to walk away. He wasn't going to take the chance – he had a lot of blood on his hands, but he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he killed someone he actually cared about. He could barely live with himself now.

As he started to walk away he could feel the trigger electrify his whole body. He stopped dead in his tracks and before he knew what was happening he had turned on his heal and yanked a gun from his holster. Miles was still standing there, staring at him with a small knowing. Rufus had the gun pointed at him, and his finger was itching at the trigger.

"I told you." Miles said clearly, shifting his weight from side to side. Rufus could see that he wanted to run, he could see that the natural reaction was to try to dodge everything – but Miles still stood there, his arms to his side and his eyes locked on the gun that was pointed at him.

Rufus started to panic because it was now up to _him_ to stop this. He had never been able to break the connection before, there had been times were he almost had but they had always dismissed the command before he could actually break it. He could feel the pressure start to grow in his head and before he knew it, electric waves swam through his veins. His teeth ground together and the grip on the gun tightened.

It was so difficult.

"Just do it." Miles said after a few more seconds, his eyes never leaving the gun.

Rufus shook his head and started to try to force his arm down. It started to shake, almost like he was arm wrestling with himself. The pain began to intensify making his legs shake as well. "No." He muttered through his teeth, not letting the pain get to him. He wasn't going to let it happen.

That was the moment his phone started to ring – he already knew who it was and he already knew what they were going to tell him. He didn't really care to hear whatever they were going to say and on the contrary he was going to prove them wrong. He was going to break this.

He could feel his strength start to drain from him – he was growing weaker and weaker and there was nothing he could do about it. His head was throbbing and and his veins were pulsing with electrifying pain. His eyes were focused on Miles, who was still waiting for his death to come forth.

_This is my gift to you Rufus Shinra, use it wisely. _

Before Rufus could comprehend what was happening, the gun dropped from his hand and he fell to the ground. He felt nothing – he was numb to the core. His eyes were glazed over and the only thing he could really see was the rain falling against the ground. He felt disconnected. His head was hurting even more, and before he could even think about what was occurring his eyes closed and he was sent into a dark slumber.

* * *

_See? The ending was changed. Anyway, I hope you like it better. The second chapter will be up tomorrow. _

_Please review._

_-Crimson_

_I apologize for any OCCness._


	2. Chapter 2: Awakening

_I'd like to add this as a note as well. I want to mention that a lot of what happened while Rufus was in the Organization won't be all the way revealed. It will somewhat be like what they did with Zack in Final Fantasy 7. They mentioned him, and explained who he was, but didn't really give us any back story of what exactly happened. I know Rufus is the main character in this story, but one thing I've been thinking about is making a prequel, that way people could understand this story more, letting them know exactly why Rufus has changed (Even though he still has his basic personality, he is still very rude, and he doesn't care what people think of him, and he tends not to care about much but himself.) Though he has been forced into the life as being someone he doesn't want to be, he has new character traits._

_Any questions, ask in the reviews, or PM me. I apologize again if it moves to slow, or to fast. Or if something confuses you. Honestly, this story is meant to confuse at first, because later on people will be like "Oh!" I get it!" It's like those movies where you are so confused and then something is connected and you get it. _

_Please review._

_Disclaimer- I do not own Final Fantasy 7. I am just using the characters and world for my own entertainment. However, I do own this plot._

_**This is also edited to any old readers out there, so a reread wont be a bad idea. From here on out the story will be a lot different from what it was originally, before it almost seemed I was drifting away from the main mood of this story.**_

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Two – Awakening

_Slowly Rufus opened his eyes, wincing at how bright the room was. His vision was blurred but he could barely make out a figure standing with their back to him. He sat up slowly, finding that by doing that small action it made his head throb even worse. He groaned softly and placed a hand on his forehead. Confusion started to swim through him because he didn't remember hitting his head – so why were they're bandages wrapped around it? He blinked, trying to clear his vision. It worked after a couple of minutes and finally he could see around him._

_ He already knew he was laying on the ground because he felt very uncomfortable, his muscles were sore and everything felt like he had slept on it wrong, he was also freezing cold. His suit was dirtied up and his hair wasn't gelled back anymore – it fell softly in his face, which annoyed him. His throat was dry, and when he opened his mouth to say something he quickly closed it because the person in the room with him finally turned around._

_ It was a man. His brown hair barely made it past his shoulders and his blue eyes seemed to hold nothing but sarcasm and mischief. He had on a black shirt and tattered blue jeans. His black trench coat came down to his ankles. It was strange because even though he seemed intimidating, the grin on his face only made him look the more friendly._

_ "Man am I lucky? I'm locked up with the one and only Rufus Shinra." His voice held nothing but mock humor and he crossed his arms, "They're so thoughtful."_

_ Rufus wasn't very sure how to answer to this, so he merely just blinked and muttered, "Excuse me?" His voice was hoarse and his throat was very sore. His eyes narrowed at the man standing in front of him. He noted his surrounding – The walls, ceiling and floor were carved from dirt, so he knew he must have to be underground. He also noted the bars that were blocking them from leaving. He pushed himself up slowly to stand, not wanting to cause his head to scream at him._

_ "You're excused." The man mumbled, cracking his knuckles and hitting the toe of his shoe against the ground. "The names Miles, nice to actually meet'cha."_

_ Rufus didn't care what the man's name was and he also didn't think it was nice to meet him. All he cared about was one thing - "Where am I?" He asked as he crossed his arms and grimaced at his dirty clothes. Slowly he ran a hand through his hair, still annoyed at the fact that is wasn't gelled back. Who did these people think they were? He was Rufus Shinra – he wasn't suppose to be treated like a piece of trash. _

_ "Under the Northern Crater." He answered with a wave of his hand, there was something so nonchalant about 'Miles' and it actually bothered Rufus quite a bit. _

_ "Why?"_

_ "...You were kidnapped, I thought it was obvious." _

_ Rufus bit his tongue, forcing himself not to say something smart to the man in front of him. It was more important to find out what was going on. "I understand that, but by who and why?" He said as calmly as he could. _

_ "The 'Organization'." Miles said shrugging while he quoted their name with his fingers, "They kidnapped ya because you've fucked up – that's what they tell us at least. Ya think that could come up with a more creative name..." Rufus was about to say something, but Miles continued. "Basically, this is what's going to happen. You're their new toy, and believe me I doubt they'll stop playing with you anytime soon, since you're Mr. Rufus Shinra, the ex-president of Shin-Ra and the vice President of the WRO."_

"_The Organization?" Rufus repeated, trying his best to ignore how the other man was mocking him., and how a sudden feeling of sickness formed in the pit in his stomach once he heard that last sentence. _

"_Yup." Miles said, yawning, "The Organization. Hm…." He tapped his chin, looking like he was thinking, "It's a group of people who take those who have sinned greatly and make them repent…well more like do dirty work. They think that since they're such saints, that they can turn you into a monster and make you do what they want." He pointed to his own forehead, "That bandage on your head, well that's covering one of the worst wounds you'll ever get. They put a chip into your head-"_

"_A what?" Rufus asked sharply, not liking how offhandedly the other man was explaining everything, "Who are you exactly anyway?" He asked, narrowed his eyes, "You seem to think this is funny-"_

"_It is, in a sick way." He said with a shrug, "Like I said, the names Miles, I'm not important anymore so explaining who I was doesn't matter." He grinned then continued, "The chip, or trigger, makes you follow every order they give you. Doesn't matter what it is, they say it, you do it. If you resist, well you'll be put through unbearable pain, and you'll end up doing what they say anyway." He continued to grin, "You Rufus Shinra, are about to go through hell. Think you can handle it, Sir?"_

_ Rufus narrowed his eyes, "Who are you to judge me?" He said venomously, "You don't know anything-"_

"_I know everything that everyone else knows, which seems to be the only thing to know." He said, sounding bored, "All I'm saying is you wont be catered to. You'll be treated like dirt." He raised an __eyebrow then kicked himself off the wall, "Think you can handle that, Mr. President?" He drawled, smirking when he finished._

_ Rufus shot him a glare, "I can handle anything." He said dangerously. He had come across a few people like him, but never had they been as rude to this degree, "You think you're proving something by showing mock respect?" He crossed his arms, not really taking in what Miles had told him, "You'll see, in the end you'll be the one who dies, while I walk out of this place."_

_"__If you say so." Miles said shaking his head._

* * *

"No, yep. Hell no! What's wrong with you? I didn't go looken' for the guy, I just found him! I was walkin' back to the bar because I forgot my wallet there - Yes I know it was pointless! You better stop yelln' at me! I was walking back to the bar and I found the kid - nah, he's not an actual kid, but he's younger than I could ever wish to be again. Yeah, we'll be here. See ya then."

Rufus opened his eyes slowly, and winced at how bad his head was throbbing. He felt nauseous and everything in the room seemed too bright. . Before he moved, he tried to survey his surroundings; He was laying on something soft and he noted that it smelt very clean. He looked around the room to see that he was in a small little room that had wood paneling all around it and even had red carpet. He sat himself up on his elbows and looked over to his right, to see that there was a bed beside him and that someone was laying in it.

It was that man from the bar, Charles. He was sitting against the headboard with a cigarette dangling out of his mouth. His phone was in his hand and he had an aggravated look on his face.

He must have either sensed that Rufus was staring at him, or just heard him wake up because he looked over and grinned slightly, shrugging - "I was walking back to the bar, taking the alleyways because I wanted to take the quickest way there, well I saw you passed out laying there on the ground." He put his hand up to his mouth and grabbed the cigarette, letting it set between his fingers.

"You found me?" He questioned, feeling awkward. He sat himself up as well and leaned against the headboard of the bed. He took a deep breath, his head was killing him and he felt so sick. He glanced over at the nightstand beside him and found that his cigarettes, phone and weapons were all there.

"Yup. You were just laying there, soakin' wet in the middle of the alley. You were out too man. I was just going to leave you there, but then I realized that if you died I'd feel bad so I dragged you to a hotel outside of town. I don't like sleeping where a lot of people are, plus if dragged a soaking man into a hotel in town, well that might raise questions." He shrugged and put his cigarette out.

Rufus grabbed his cigarette pack and took one out, hoping that this would help ease his headache. "I see – so because we're in a hotel outside of town, the people here didn't find it strange?"

"Nope. I'm sure they've seen weirder shit."

There was a comfortable silence that fell between the two of them. Rufus finished off his cigarette and cursed to himself when it didn't help with his throbbing head. He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to recall what had happened before he so magically "passed out."

_This is my gift to you Rufus Shinra, use it wisely. _

Those words slowly came to the surface of his mind and his eyes opened suddenly. That Cetra girl's voice...Aerith she had spoken to him at the very last second, He started to remember what happened. Miles. The connection. The solution. It all slowly came back to him and then he realized something, his head hurt but he also didn't feel the pressure of the trigger anymore.

The question was though – where did Miles go?

He tried not to think about it to much, because it wasn't going to help any. He knew that Miles could take care of himself and that he'd see him later on down the road. It wasn't the fact that he didn't know where he was, it was just the fact that he left Rufus there in the middle of an alleyway that bothered him. Then again, Miles probably had his reasons.

"So, what are you going to do now?" Charles asked, looking over the the ex President.

"I don't know." He mumbled, feeling a little overwhelmed.

"Junon? Edge? Maybe even Midgar?"

Rufus sat up straight and looked over at Miles, "Midgar?" he asked, "Midgar is dead."

"You've been gone for three and a half years – things change. You're walking proof of that, aren't you?" Charles sighed, "They've been working on rebuilding Midgar almost everyday since the project started, and that was right after you left."

"I didn't leave." He said a little to quickly.

There was a few seconds of silence before Charles said, "Yeah, I guess you're right." He sighed then continued, "Anyway, they're still working on rebuilding it but sector 5 and 7 are done – they worked on those two first for whatever reason. People live there now, I wish I could say that there wasn't going to be a slums anymore, but I guess some things wont ever change...at the very least it isn't as bad as it used to, still a little sketchy, but it's bearable and still way cheaper."

He didn't say anything for a few minutes. For some reason the news of Midgar being rebuilt made him realize that life had been going on without him. He had been thinking about how different his life was, and how he missed the past – but he never thought about how other people's lives had been within the three years and a half years. He didn't really think about how life was progressing and moving on without him.

Just because he was gone, didn't mean life stopped.

"So? Any specific destination in mind?" Charles asked again, cracking his knuckles.

It was then he realized that he was free. He wasn't going back to the Organization – he didn't have to. It was all over, at least it was for him. He didn't have to go through the operations anymore, he didn't have to be tortured anymore, he didn't have to have innocent's blood on his hands. It was all over.

He was done. He could go home.

A small smile adored his face and he let himself get caught up in the idea in going "home." But where exactly was home? His smile faltered when he realized that there wasn't really a place for him to call _home__. _Was it at the WRO, bossing around his Turks and ignoring Reeve all the time? Was it in Edge bothering AVALANCHE? Was it Junon? Midgar? Where _was_ his home?

He thought back to the WRO and his Turks – there wasn't a point in going back there. He wasn't the same person. He still had the superior exterior and even had the same authority about him, but he didn't want the respect anymore. Over the course of the first year in the Organization, people had mocked him and he just couldn't take it. All the fake 'sirs' and 'Mr. Shinra.' or 'Mr. President.' - He just couldn't take the mockery. He told people to call him Rufus, his real name. After awhile they all did, and he knew that going back to the WRO, people would call him all of the 'respectable' names he now couldn't stand.

Three years ago he wouldn't have cared that all the respect people ever shown him was fake, he wouldn't have cared that the only reason he got everything he wanted was because people were scared of him. It was different now though, because he wasn't the one scaring people, he was being scared – he'd never admit that to anyone though. There were times when he didn't sleep for weeks at a time, and when he knew that no one was around he'd shake uncontrollably. He hated all of them, every last person inside that "Organization." He didn't want that though, if people had hated _him_ like he hated_ them_ – it's just wrong to make people feel that much anger and terror. He didn't want it, none of the power, none of the money – all he wanted was to leave everything behind him.

But there was no way he could do that.

He had seen power abused to its fullest extent. He didn't want anything to do with it anymore, he had once been a power crazed fool. Someone who controlled people with fear. Well, he had been controlled with a chip, a simple piece of metal or whatever it was made out of. He did something that even his Turk's couldn't imagine. He didn't want anything to do with power. He just wanted to walk away and start over but he was Rufus Shinra, he couldn't walk away and start over.

Charles interrupted his thoughts, "Cid's gonna pick me up soon." His voice seemed to echo off the walls, bringing Rufus's attention all on his words - "We're gonna go to Edge, I was thinking that if you wanted you could take along. It'd give you a chance to see Midgar too – plus, where else are you really gonna go?"

He was silent for a moment. He didn't really know what he wanted to do, but Charles was right, it wasn't like he had any other place to go right now. Plus, walking around and letting people see him in broad daylight was a bad idea – he could only imagine the reactions. "Alright." He said, taking a long drag from his cigarette and sighing, "When is he suppose to be here?"

"In a few hours probably." He answered with a yawn, "Man..I haven't gotten any sleep since I found you." he ran a hand through his hair and shook his head, "I had to make sure you were still breathin', every time I closed my eyes I would get all paranoid you'd die while I was sleeping."

"How long have I been asleep?" Rufus asked, growing slightly curious to why Charles was so tired.

"For about three days." He said as he sighed, lifting his arms up to stretch. "It was like every time I closed my eyes, my conscious said 'you better stay awake, he might die on ya.' so I haven't slept in three days."

"I've been asleep for three days?" His eyes widened and he blinked stupidly, he understood why, it was just so strange knowing that for three days he hadn't done anything but lay in a bed and sleep.

"Yup. Three days." Charles said while shrugging, "Don't get the wrong idea, it's not like you've been peacefully sleeping. You've been moanin' and groanin' – I even had to flip you over and lean your head over the trashcan beside the bed so you wouldn't throw up on yourself and the bed then choke and die."

"Sounds like the past three days have sucked." Rufus commented, cringing at the idea of all of that.

"It was gross, but oh well. I saved ya – you're welcome."

It was silent for a few more seconds. Usually the silence didn't bother Rufus, he had become accustomed to being silent for the past three years, whenever he said something most of the time it was the wrong thing…needless to say he was _'punished' _for it. He sighed at the thought then looked over at his phone.

"You should sleep." He commented.

"Nah." Charles said with a small wave of his hand, "I'll sleep on Cid's airship – if I try to sleep now then I wont wake up for awhile."

"Makes sense." He mumbled.

Rufus sat there, unmoving for a few seconds. The idea of seeing someone he actually knew again filled him with excitement and panic. His heart started to beat faster and he had that shaking feeling in his chest. He hadn't seen a familiar face in three and a half years – he felt like he was almost stepping back in a time warp. He was going to see Cid, someone he used to see all the time at the Seventh Heaven in Edge, well on most Fridays.

"Ya know," Charles said abruptly, putting his hands behind his head and sighing, "People are gonna wanna know where you've been – it's odd that you left all of a sudden, and not you're back, without any warning."

"I know." He said, shrugging, "Let them wonder."

"You're not going to tell them anything?"

"No."

"Why not?" Charles asked,

"It's not their business."

"Actually, considering you've been where everyone else it, it is their business." He yawned, "Besides, I'm sure your Turks would like to know where you've been."

Rufus was silent for a few moments, he knew the other man was right but that still didn't make him want to tell anyone what had happened. It wouldn't change anything. "An Explanation wont change anything, what happened, happened."

"Whatever happened down there, had a huge impact on you. People are gonna wanna know-"

"I don't care." Rufus said finally, "I don't care what people want, I don't care if they are curious, I don't give a damn. They can wonder all they want, they can say what they want, they can make up all the stories they want. I'm not telling them, unless I want to. And frankly I don't want to tell them anything, because I know exactly how they'll react."

"And how is that?"

"Pity." He said simply.

"Ah."

Rufus reached over and yanked a cigarette out of his carton, he placed between his lips roughly then lit it. He didn't want pity from anyone. He didn't want people to look at him with sad eyes and tell them they were sorry, because what did sorry do? Nothing. He didn't want any of it. All he wanted was to walk for himself again. He just wanted his freedom and he finally acquired it. He didn't want anything else.

"The truth always has a way of coming out." Charles said after about a minute, "I hope you understand that."

* * *

_This is also slightly edited, the next chapter are going to be the ones that are changed the most, I really hope people will enjoy this story._

_I promise there is an actual plot, it's not just Rufus brooding all the time. But he has to have his time to live again, at least for a little while longer. Soon enough though, a lot more will happen. So I hope you enjoy the ride. _

_Meh, sorry for a lot not happening, please review. The next chapter will be up soon. _

_-Crimson_


	3. Chapter 3: What goes around comes around

_Here's chapter Three. _

_And yes, Rufus will be meeting with all the others as well – well some of them. Edited._

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

_Chapter Three - What goes around comes around_

It was strangely cold outside, making Rufus shove his hands deep in his pockets and shift his weight from foot to foot. They were standing out in a field behind the hotel, which was oddly calm, waiting for Cid to pick them up. Mountains surrounded the area, making the field closed in. The sky was pure white and it almost looked like it was going to snow.

"Ya see anything yet?" Charles asked as he yawned. Rufus glanced over at him and wasn't surprised when he saw the other man light another cigarette. Charles had smoked at least six of them while they had been standing out there and it hadn't even been an hour.

Rufus looked around, looking over the mountains to see if he saw anything flying over them. He saw nothing, but he heard something start to approach them. "East." He muttered, trying to shove his hands deeper in his pockets due to how cold the air was. He glanced over at Charles again, who seemed to be trying to figure out which way was east. "It's this way." Rufus added, nodding in the direction he was standing toward. He had his guns and daggers strapped in place again, plus his cigarettes in his back jean pocket. He didn't know when he picked up the habit exactly, but over the past few years it had gotten worse.

"Hmmm. How do you know that?" Charles asked, squinting his eyes, "I don't see anything."

"I can hear it."

It was silent for a few moments, Rufus grinned slightly at the look on Charles's face as he listened intently, "Oh." He said simply, before throwing his cigarette on the ground and crushing it with his boot, "Ya know kid," He said while shaking his head, "I haven't even thought about what Cid's gonna do when he sees you."

"That makes two of us." Rufus said dryly, "If he figures it out, he figures it out." He shrugged lightly, "I'm not gonna go out of my way to explain myself."

The fact was though, he didn't really care about explaining himself. He just didn't want to have to deal with the reactions. There were a lot of different ways people could feel about his sudden return, and not knowing what they would be is what put him on edge. If anything, he was hoping he wouldn't be recognized at all. He rather people treat him like someone they just met, rather than the newly found "Rufus Shinra."

That wasn't the exact truth either, he wanted people to know who he was – he just didn't want people to see him the way he predicted he would be seen.

Charles grinned, "This should be interesting."

"It should."

A few more moments passed before the airship came into total view. Rufus felt a knot form in his stomach and a tingling feeling in his chest. He knew it was because he was about to see someone he actually knew. He couldn't remember the last time he saw a familiar face.

He cracked his knuckles absentmindedly and glanced over at Charles, who's grin had only grown bigger as the airship approached them. If he wasn't so nervous, he'd probably be smiling himself. But the feeling of panic started to outgrow the excitement. He was scared because the feeling of freedom hadn't settled in yet, and he just wasn't mentally prepared to see people he had attempted to forget about.

The Shera finally made it's way to them and started to lower itself. The familiar feeling of air pushing down on him made Rufus sigh heavily, he just wasn't ready for this. The ramp slowly unfolded and laid itself out in front of them. Charles immediately started to walk up it, and when Rufus didn't immediately follow he turned around.

"Ya comin' kid?" He hollered, raising an eyebrow.

Rufus almost said 'no,' but he gave a slight nod and began to walk up the ramp. His heart was pounding in his chest and his hands were sweaty – he, the great Rufus Shinra, was nervous.

A small thought entered his mind – if he was nervous to see Cid, how was he going to react to seeing Reno and his other Turks? How was he going to react to seeing his old team?

The real question was though, how would they react to seeing him?

He shook his head and decided that he'd just address if when it happened. He followed Charles through some hallways and after a few more seconds they reached an automatic sliding glass door. When they stepped through it, he immediately felt overwhelmed.

The smell of cheap cigarette smoke filled his nostrils, mixed with grease and oil. He knew that smell all to well, from his few visits to Rocket Town, and the few times he had flown on the man's airship during his days at the WRO - it was non other than the smell of Cid Highwind. He didn't see the man anywhere at first, but that didn't last for long.

"I was wonderin' where the hell you two were, I thought you got lost 'er somethin'."

The sound of Cid Highwind's voice was enough to make Rufus want to throw up and hide. He felt himself freeze, but his head slowly turned and saw the pilot waltzing over to them with his signature grin.

He walked over to Charles and smacked him on the shoulder, "Where the hell have you been?" He said loudly, "I haven't seen you fer years!"

"Sorry..." Charles said smiling, "I've been caught up in some things."

"Yeah, yeah." Cid said waving his hand. He looked over at Rufus and grinned a little "Sorry! I should introduce myself!" He held out his hand and his grin broadened, "I'm Cid Highwind! I'm the pilot of this baby – her name's Shera."

Rufus stared at the hand like a foreign object. Slowly he reached out and shook the man's hand. He looked up to meet Cid's eyes and said evenly, "I'm Rufus." He saw a small flash of _something_ go through the man's eyes, but it quickly went away.

Cid withdrew his hand and scratched his head, "Didn't mean to stare at ya...ya just..." He shook his head, "nevermind." He seemed like something was seriously bothering him as he began to walk away. He stopped suddenly though and turned around to look at Rufus, "Ya got a last name kid?"

Rufus just stared at him for a second. He felt his heart start to pound harder in his chest and he started to feel light headed. Cid kept looking at him, waiting for a response.

"It's Shinra." he said quietly, his lips barely moving in the process.

Everything in the moment seemed to pause. There was no sound and there was absolutely no movement – just the widened eyes that the pilot Cid Highwind now had. He stared at the man in front of him with his mouth hanging ajar.

Charles was the one to break the silence, "Ya look like ya've seen a ghost Cid." He chuckled lightly, "Ya didn't think he was actually dead, did ya?" He walked over to Rufus and smacked his shoulder in a friendly manor, "I doubt anyone could actually take this kid down."

Cid didn't say a word. He just stared at Rufus, his eyes holding a dangerous look. "So," He finally said, "What the hell happened to you? Ya look like a refugee."

_Maybe I am..._Rufus thought to himself. He didn't know what to say at first. What was there to really say in the first place?

It turns out he didn't have to say anything, because Cid switched his attention to Charles, "It's kinda funny...you of all people find him. You've been missing yourself." he took a deep breath and pulled his pack of cigarettes out of his pockets. "We've been lookin' for him for years, and we didn't come up with shit."

Rufus's head cocked to the side slightly, why did he say "we?" He'd been looking for him as well? "You looked for me?" Rufus asked quietly, feeling embarrassed how his voice sounded so weak.

"Yep." Cid said as he placed a cigarette between his lips and lit it. "For about three years now."

"But why did you look?"

"I'm the man with the huge airship."

The ex president shook his head, "You're not he only man with an airship."

"Look – I was doin' a favor for those damn Turkeys of yours. Reno came and asked me to a few months after you disappeared, and ever since then I've been helpin them look." He rolled his eyes, "Reeve even increased my damn pay – so why the hell wouldn't I look?"

Rufus felt his heart jerk a little when he heard his Turk's name. Even after all this time, they still looked? They even asked a member of AVALANCHE to help.

Cid grumbled something under his breath then looked at Rufus, "So where to? Junon? I know your Turkey's are there for the day. I'm headin' to Edge."

The words came out of his mouth before he realized it - "They aren't _my_ Turks anymore."

"Yeah right." Cid said with a wave of his hand. "They've never stopped lookin' for you. Even though it was a lost cause, or at least seemed like one." He ran a hand through his hair, "They've looked every single day, and one of them went missing themselves because of it." he looked at Rufus and narrowed his eyes, "Not your Turks my ass."

Rufus stood dumbfounded for a second. What did he mean by that? One of them went missing? "Excuse me?" He said a little too sharply.

"Tseng. He's been missin' for like a year now." He started to walk away again, "Let that ponder in your thoughts for awhile."

Tseng had gone missing? But why? Of all people how did they capture Tseng? He felt his heart start to pound in his chest once again and he felt a little light headed. The real question was though, why hadn't Rufus noticed? If he had been missing a year, than that means he had to be with _them. _ So how could he _not_ have noticed?

How?

"So, where am I taken ya?" Cid called to him, raising an eyebrow.

Rufus was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't even hear Cid call to him. He was barely aware of his own surroundings anymore. Just knowing that Tseng was most likely there at that exact moment, was eating at him.

Charles shook him by the shoulder, "Kid." Rufus jerked his head to look at Charles, "Where're ya goin'?"

Rufus sighed and shook his head slightly, he had no idea where he was going. "I don't really have a set destination in mind..." He muttered, shoving his hands in his pocket. "You won't have to worry," He said finally, "Once we reach Edge I'll leave. You won't have to worry about dragging me anywhere-"

"You don't wanna head to Junon?" Cid asked dumbfounded, "Cause that's where everyone you'll probably want to see is at."

Rufus felt himself shiver, just the thought of seeing all of them again chilled him to the bone. He couldn't deal with it at that moment. "No. Edge is fine."

With that being said he pulled a cigarette out and lit it, feeling slightly better after taking a long drag. It didn't really matter where he was going – he was going to see people he knew, there was no avoiding it.

He just wanted to avoid seeing that ones that actually really mattered to him, at least for now.

They reached Edge in a matter of hours; Rufus hadn't moved from his spot leaning against the wall, and he hadn't spoken one word either. Charles and Cid kept carrying on random conversations; talking about family, old memories, how Cid was in the married life, and how work was. They basically covered everything that needed to be covered.

"Edge in ten!" Cid called, he looked back at Rufus, who was looking at the ground with his arms crossed. "Hey - " Rufus didn't move from his spot, Charles shrugged at his cousin. "Rufus." He tried again, and the ex president looked up at him. Cid waved him over and sighed.

Rufus kicked himself off the wall and made his way over to the duo, he placed his hands in his pockets and moved his head to the side to glide his hair out of his face. "Yeah?" He said calmly.

The pilot scratched his head then sighed, "Listen...things aren't..." He sighed then shook his head, "Things aren't how they were when you left – errr, disappeared...or whatever. Everything has changed." The pilot scratched his head and casted a look toward the ground, "Cloud and Vincent – they're gone too."

The whole world seemed to grow still as Rufus soaked in all the new information. He didn't move, his eyes were staring at the man in front of him and his immediate thought was _Where the hell was I when all of this happened? _How could he not have sensed it? How could he be so blind to the fact that there were people he knew in there? How could he not sense the great Cloud Strife? How could all of this happen?

Cid continued while Rufus pondered the information he was receiving, "Edge looks a lot like the Slums now. Because there was no real security like there is in the new Midgar and Junon." He sighed again and just gave Rufus a disappointed look, "Just prepare yourself because I promise the sight you're going to see isn't pretty. It's bigger, but that doesn't help the cause." He sighed, "Alright, we're here."

Rufus merely nodded his head, his mind not being able to grasp the fact that he wasn't the only thing being destroyed in the past three years. The world was being torn apart – not just him. His heart seemed to sink in his chest as he let his mind wander to Tseng, Cloud and Vincent – how could this have happened? Cloud Strife, the planet's hero? Vincent Valentine, the ex Turk? Tseng, his most trusted companion?

How did all of this happen?

Cid didn't say another word, he just walked past the now confused and dazed Rufus Shinra with his eyes casted toward the ground. Nothing felt real anymore, not even the excitement that Rufus had felt earlier, when the only thing on his mind was a face he knew. He glanced over at Charles and saw that he was staring at him with narrowed eyes, almost like he was critiquing him.

"What?" Rufus asked bluntly, not having the patience to deal with anything else at that moment.

"Did you honestly think that once you got out of there, that everything was going to be the way it was before you left?" There was no emotion in the words he spoke back, just merely a small question that made the ex President narrow his eyes as well. "Life, has only went downhill – nothing is the same. I don't know what you expected."

Rufus said nothing, he merely turned around to go follow Cid.

_What did you expect? _

_ Nothing is the same. _

_ Did you honestly think that one you got out of there, that everything was going to be the way it was before you left?_

The words kept repeating in his head and it was almost unbearable because in the back of his mind, he knew Charles was right. The world moved on without him, in good and bad ways. He tried to ignore the thoughts that were trying to surface themselves, and continued to follow Cid out of the Airship, ignoring Charles who was now walking beside him.

In all honesty, he didn't know what he expected.

They all stepped out of the airship and into the cold air. Right when Rufus took his first step off the ramp of the airship, is thoughts were interrupted as he stared at how much Edge had expanded. However, the real thing he was staring at were the plates of Midgar that were back up a few miles away from them, they were visible from where they were at, and he couldn't believe how much building New Midgar had actually happened.

"Oh yeah.." Cid said slowly, realizing that this was the ex president's first time seeing New Midgar, "they've been rebuilding every day just about, you'd be surprised how many people were actually willing to help." Rufus nodded and marveled in how amazing it was to see Midgar back, well at least part of it. Cid's voice broke his thoughts though, "C'mon, the Seventh Heaven isn't far from here."

Rufus nodded and followed him to where he soon knew he'd be seeing Tifa Lockhart. His hands were in his pocket's again and he was surprised to see that he wasn't as nervous as he thought he was. He wasn't sure why but hearing that Strife, Valentine and Tseng had been taken, it was almost as if he couldn't feel. He was overcome with such confusion and a strange feeling of self disappointment that he didn't even care that he was going to see someone else he hadn't seen in three years.

He wanted to save them.

He knew he wasn't a hero, and he'd never claim to be one. He was the big bad man that helped almost destroy the planet, and he was fine being remembered that way, because at least that was a true statement. Him being a hero? That was just a joke. He didn't feel the desire to save any of the others, in fact he hadn't let the thought of saving people even entertain his mind for more than a second, because he hadn't undergone an amazing personality change – he was still the same selfish man, and even though he may not be exactly the same, he would never fully change into someone he clearly was not meant to be.

As he walked he started to survey his surroundings, and then Cid's words hit him _"Edge looks a lot like the Slums now. Because there was no real security like there is in the new Midgar and Junon...Just prepare yourself because I promise the sight you're going to see isn't pretty." _He hadn't been lying what so ever – it looked terrbile. It was almost horrifying. There were so many dirty children running around, and then he started to realize all the wives without husbands, and the husbands without wives, all the children without mothers or fathers...and all the mother and fathers without children. Rufus felt his throat start to burn as reality started to set in even harder – almost _nothing_ good had happened in the past three years.

All of his thoughts were interrupted when his companions stopped, and he was right outside of the Seventh Heaven. He watched as Cid and Charles made their way up the few steps and to the front door, they walked in without looking at him, and left him there by himself. Rufus found that the feeling of panic had risen in his chest again, he threw all of this previous thoughts in the back of his mind and slowly made his way up the few steps as well. He glanced at the "Open" sign inside the window, and noticed that it looked exactly the same since the last time he had been there. He swallowed hard and pushed the door open, taking a deep breath as he did so.

The sight he was greeted to was one he would never forget. Tifa was behind the bar counter, smiling at Cid as she cleaned a bar glass with an old rag. She looked up to see him as the bell rang, signaling that someone had walked inside. Rufus almost stopped dead in his tracks when he saw her, not because he was so shocked to see her, but because he was shocked at her appearance.

Her hair didn't look as thick as it used to, it was thrown up into a messy bun that only shown her now skinny face. She had lost all the color to her cheeks, and her eyes looked dull and broken. Her once contagious smile was now nothing more than a small raise of the lips, clearly showing how much she couldn't bring herself to truly smile. He glanced at her figure quickly and felt something rise in his chest – she was skinny to the bone it looked like. Her arms looked like twigs, and her once nice curvy figure was belittled down to looking like a skeleton.

"Hello." She called to him, "Can I help you?" Her voice didn't hold the sweetness it once had either, she sounded so quiet, and it was then that Rufus realized what the feeling in his chest was. It was guilt. She was like this because of the disappearance of Strife, and maybe even Valentine – he should have seen them! He should have noticed or at least felt something.

But he hadn't, and as a result, Tifa Lockhart was nothing more than someone who's soul had died but body kept living.

He swallowed hard once again and tried his best to muster a smile, which turned out to look like something more of a halfhearted grin, "I'm with them actually." He said slowly as he walked over and sat down a few bar stools away from them. He cast his eyes to the bar, because he couldn't bare to look at her. He couldn't bare to see the pain he had caused someone he knew, he couldn't bare to see that someone else he knew had gone through some type of pain in the time he was gone.

The feeling in his chest only worsened as he heard her talk to Cid and Charles. It was so different, seeing her in such a state. He thought back to when he used to visit her randomly, showing up and seeing her glare at him and then smiling later with their small banter. He remember when Cloud would come back from whatever he was doing and mumble something about needing to raising the standards of the bar and would then ignore him for a few minutes before they would discuss things going on in the WRO. He even thought back to how the little girl Marlene had seemed to take a liking to him because she would burst through the door and scream "Mr. Rufus!" and would run over to him and bother him with small child talk. The boy however, Denzel was a different story, he had never liked seeing Rufus around, and whenever he did his eyes would turn into small daggers and he'd leave the room immediately. After awhile he tolerated his presence, but he never took a liking to him.

"Hello." The sudden voice of Tifa near, dragged him out of his thoughts. He looked up to meet her gaze and she gave him another weak smile, "It's nice to meet you, I'm Tifa." She held out her small frail hand to him and continued, "What's your name?"

He looked at her hand for a moment and slowly reached out and took it into his own, he closed around it gently and almost cringed at how boney it felt. "Rufus." He said quietly, releasing her hand slowly and bringing them back down to rest on the bar counter.

"It's nice to meet you..." She said in a strange voice, she stared at him for a few moments and then gently shook her head, "Can I get you anything?"

He was about to say scotch, but changed his mind when he glanced at her again. She was so weak, so fragile looking. She looked like an old shell of a person he used to know. He couldn't be cold to her, he might be an evil selfish person, but he couldn't just let someone he knew keep breaking. He gave her a small smile, "A Wutian Tea." He said evenly, locking eyes with her.

All of a sudden her eyes lit up and she smiled, the smile he used to see whenever he visited. "Rufus." She said gently, reaching over and grabbing his hand, "Is it really you?" She added quickly.

He nodded his head and let her hold his hand for a moment, he couldn't find any words to say so he merely just continued to look at her awkwardly, hoping that she'd say something to fill the sudden silence.

"I am so happy to see you're alright." She whispered to him, he realized that she was shaking slightly, and that her eyes were glossed over. "You have no idea how much we've all wondered about you..." Her voice trailed off and she looked over at Cid, "Where did you find him?" She asked, a new light shinning in her eyes.

Cid pointed his thumb in Charles's direction, "He found him in some shit town passed out." He said while downing the rest of his drink.

She nodded and then turned her attention back onto Rufus, she squeezed his hand then let go, "Where...where were you?" She asked suddenly, as she began to get his drink ready. Rufus felt a knot form in his throat and when she placed his drink in front of him, he realized that he wasn't going to be able to keep this from everyone.

"I am not sure how to explain it." He said honestly, picking his drink up and taking a sip of it. "It's...not easy to describe."

"Were you where everyone else is?"

"Yes." He answered quietly, not wanting to talk about it at that moment.

"Are...are they alive?" She asked doubtfully, "I just need to know...I have to know.." She said barely above a whisper. Tears started to stream down her face, and when she locked eye with him again, he was almost surprised to see a small amount of spark in them.

"I assume they would be...considering who they are." Rufus finally managed, taking another swig of his drink. "There's no way that AVALANCHE would ever perish in such a way." He added, hoping that his confidence would fill her with some type of hope.

"Thank you." She said with a new smile pn her face, "That...really does mean a lot, more than you think it does." She looked over at Cid and then back to Rufus. She was about to say something else when a sudden voice broke through the calm room -

"I'm hoooome!"

He didn't know why he felt another wave of panic wash over him. Marlene was just a little girl, at least the last time he had seen her she was ten years old...so that meant she was thirteen now. He turned around in his seat, now filled with curiosity. When he looked at her he was floored to see how much she looked like Tifa and Aerith had been smashed together.

The girl had her hair tied up with a pink ribbon, yet her eyes weren't as gentle. She had eyes that betrayed her age, and Rufus was suddenly aware that she must have had to grow up fast since she was family with AVALANCHE. Her outfit was nothing out of the ordinary, just a white shirt with a brown vest, blue jeans and knee high brown boots. She looked so different than the last time he'd seen her.

When his eyes met her she stopped in her tracks. She stared at him for a moment and then her head cocked to the side slightly, "Rufus Shinra?" She asked quietly her brown eyes critiquing him. She looked over at Cid and Charles for a moment, and then looked right back at Rufus. "It's really you isn't it?" She asked again, more confidence in her voice.

He didn't know why she had no problem figuring out who he was, but he didn't ask either. He merely nodded to her and then turned back around to face the bar. He was shaken because it seemed as if everything he had known was changing – even a little girl was no longer a little girl.

Footsteps approached him, and then Marlene came into his side view. She sat down beside him and continued to stare at him. She didn't say anything for a few minutes, but suddenly her voice broke through the silence, "Everyone in there...wherever you were...is going through a lot of pain, aren't they?"

The question struck Rufus as odd, so he looked over at her and raised an eye brow, "What do you mean?" He asked quietly, not sure how to respond to such a question.

"Your new appearance aside, your eyes aren't the same." She said it like it was the most obvious thing, and when Rufus didn't reply she continued, "You used to give people a sharp look, like you were showing people power with your eyes...now you just look miserable...you look broken." She whispered the last part and sighed when she still didn't evoke a response from him. "I just...Cloud and Vincent...are they going through as much pain as you obviously have?"

Rufus glanced at her then, and realized he was right when he said her eyes showed her true age...her mind was obviously grown beyond a thirteen year old girls. He looked away from her to the bar counter and placed his hand to settle around his glass. "I do not know for sure what has happened to Strife and Valentine." he glanced over at her then, and he saw that her eyes were narrowed at him, she wasn't going to give up easily.

Tifa cut in then, "Marlene, you don't need to worry about things like - "

Marlene's voice interrupted her, "I am not a little girl – I want to know. Aunt Yuffie was fifteen when she helped fight Sephiroth, and I'm only two years younger." She shot Tifa a glare, "I want to know the truth. I am not going to live in this phantasy world where I accept nothing but lies, just to make me feel better." She looked at Rufus again and her eyes were narrow slits now, "What has happened to them?"

Rufus was almost blown away by her response, how could a mere thirteen year old girl think in such a way? He cleared his throat then said evenly, "They are probably undergoing a lot of painful surgeries, in which they are experimented on. They may have even lost their minds – anything can happen there..._anything.__" _When he looked over at the new-found teenager, he saw that she didn't look as surprised as he thought she would.

"They're alive though, at least you believe so?" She asked quietly, her gaze now focused on lap.

"Yes, if I'm alive there's no doubt that they are." He looked over at Tifa and saw that she seemed to be in a conflict, he wanted to smack himself for saying what he said earlier, but the truth was the truth, what was he suppose to say?

"Hey!" Cid's voice broke through the silence, "Marlene, you aren't even going to say hi to your uncle Cid?"

* * *

_I noticed this was a very long chapter. Sorry, but maybe that's a good thing to? Because I hate making so many tiny chapters, I love writing long ones. I feel like the shorter they are, the more you're just trying to throw chapters out there. Oh well._

_Please review. _

_Edited._

_-Crimson_


	4. Chapter 4: Rain

_This is where the story will start to change completely, I hope that people will enjoy it more in this direction than the direction it was headed into last time. This story probably won't be pairing Rufus with anyone, unless there is a very big demand, which I doubt there will be. _

_Please Review if you can, I love feedback and I know this story hasn't been up for long. I had planned on editing the everything then posting, but in the middle of editing I realized that I was going to be changing the story's actual plot...so I posted what I DID edit, and now I'm going from there! :)_

_So please, if you can review! And if for some odd reason unknown to man if you can't, message me because I love feedback. _

_**By the way, there's someone I'd love for you all to check out! JenesisX.**_

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Four – Rain

Saying that it was strange to be sleeping on something clean and soft again was an understatement, he couldn't remember the last time he had actually felt comfortable trying to sleep. Tifa had kept asking him to stay the night, along with Cid and Charles, so he finally gave up and decided that staying wasn't the worst idea.

It wasn't like had had anywhere else to go. Not anywhere he was _ready_ to go.

It was to quiet to sleep though. He wasn't used to such a comfortable environment; he was used to the never ending torrents of screams and taunts. He was used to being kept awake for days at a time in labs while those _people_ poked and prodded at his head. No, Rufus wasn't used to sleeping and he found that now that he had the chance, he just couldn't.

Maybe it was because he knew that Tseng, Cloud and Vincent were probably lying awake right now. Were they all just as terrified as he had been? Were they trembling? Screaming? Crying? What was going on there now? Once he started thinking about all of them, his mind just wouldn't shut off. All he could think about was whatever could be happening to them. He knew first hand that there wasn't a time where the pain stopped.

_How could I be such an idiot? How did I not notice? How?_

The thoughts kept plaguing his mind; he just couldn't stop screaming at himself. How? Why? It just wouldn't stop. He couldn't believe he had been so dense and self absorbed to not realize and look at his surroundings more! He had been so closed into himself, he had tried to shut down the outside world and in doing so, people he knew were slowly going to slip into insanity, just like he almost did.

Rufus stared at the ceiling, unable to close his eyes. Their faces kept flashing before his mind, making the thought of sleep nothing but a joke. He wondered if this is what Valentine felt like at one point, he used to blame himself for everything, just like Rufus was doing now. _Why is it that now that I have my freedom, I feel the more restrained?_ He asked himself, unable to fathom the new self loathing feeling inside of him.

During the three and a half years of being nothing but a puppet, made Rufus hate himself for being weak. He had hated himself for turning into something that was uglier than a monster. He had wanted to die, and the only time he ever felt human was when he was put through pain. But this feeling was entirely different, he didn't hate himself because of his weakness, he hated himself because he was the cause of other people's pain, but not just _anybody's _pain – people he knew.

Tseng, the man that had practically raised him was now rotting somewhere under the Northern Crater, and there was nothing he could do about it. He couldn't tell people where they were being held captive, because then the WRO would go there and murder people who couldn't even control their own minds – that's just inhumane, ever for him. Rufus was no saint but he knew that bloodshed was not going to solve this problem_._

_What do you do with an army of people who are forced to be there? _

Rufus shook his head once again and tried to rid his mind of the thoughts he was having. Slowly he sat up and swung his legs over the side of the bed. His feet hit the cold hardwood flooring and he stood up. He walked over to the dresser in the room and grabbed his daggers and guns, strapping them in place and shoving his cigarettes in his pocket. Walking over to the door he looked back at the room he had been allowed to stay in, he sighed and then slowly opened the door and walked out into the hallway. He made his way to the stairs quietly, hoping not to wake anyone else up.

It looked like it was at least five in the morning, which seemed about right because he hadn't lain down until about two and when he had he had been thinking. The sky was starting to light up, but the Sun was still nowhere in sight.

When Rufus walked into the bar section of the house, he was glad to see that no one else was there. He walked over to sit on one of the bar stools and then turned around to face the front windows, propping his elbows on the bar counter and leaning back on it. He had never actually observed the inside of the bar, because he had always been distracted by Tifa or Cloud. He looked over all the walls and saw that there were pictures _everywhere_. Pictures of AVALANCHE together were hung on the walls, and setting on shelves.

Rufus stood up and walked over to one of the walls, looking at all of the memories that the group shared together. He was surprised when he saw a picture of the young Cetra, Aerith. She stood in between Cloud and Tifa smiling brightly while making a peace sign. He saw that they were all standing on the beach, so it must have been taken at Costa de Sol. He took a step back and then looked over the other pictures hanging on the walls, and a certain one caught his eye.

The picture contained Tifa as a teenager, wearing a brown cowboy hat and vest. The shirt under the vest exposed her midriff and she wore a short brown skirt. She had boots that came up to her knees – she looked like a little cowgirl and Rufus found himself grinning because she looked so childish. However, that isn't why the picture caught his eye – he looked at the figure standing to her left and he felt a small stab of guilt.

Zack Fair was standing there beside her, showing off the grin he always gave people. He was giving the camera a thumbs up and he had his other hand holding onto the hilt of his sword. He had on the traditional SOLDIER 1st class uniform and he seemed to be enjoying the moment. Rufus sighed as he gave the ex SOLDIER one last look. He dragged his eyes to the next person, the one who surprised Rufus the most.

Sephiroth stood on the other side of Tifa. He had Masamune at his side and he really didn't seem like he cared about the picture one bit. It was his eyes that Rufus couldn't get out of his mind – they were so powerful, but they didn't hold the evil that they would later. This picture was the last sign of Sephiroth's sanity, the last living proof that he hadn't been born crazy. He really did just look like an important man with better things to do than take pictures.

He tore his gaze way from the picture, finding that seeing the old General in such a state of normality gave him the chills. He glanced at other pictures on the wall, and found that AVALANCHE really was a dysfunctional family, much like he and his Turks used to have. He was about to walk away when another picture stopped him.

Reno was sitting at the bar; he pointed his hands at the picture like they were guns and had a sloppy grin on his face. Rude was sitting next to him and seemed to be shaking his head at him. Rufus grinned when he saw his Turks, and then saw that Tseng and Elena were there as well in the background sitting at a booth, both glancing over at Reno with amused expressions. He was still grinning when he realized he was in the picture was well, he was on the other side of Rude, white suit on with a Wutian Tea to his lips. His hair was gelled back and he didn't even seem to be paying any attention to the camera. His grin slid off his face as he glanced from his new appearance to his old appearance.

He had changed so much since then, and it then made him think – if he, Rufus Shinra had undergone such a dramatic change, what about Strife, Valentine and Tseng? What was going to become of them?

"Rufus?"

His head snapped over in the direction of the voice that had just called his name. It was Tifa, she was staring at him with a curious expression on her face. She walked over to stand beside him and then looked at the pictures as well.

"It's strange sometimes, isn't it?" She asked quietly, "To see yourself from the past, or to see people's faces that you haven't seen in awhile."

"Yeah." He agreed slowly, glancing over at her. "Why do you keep this picture?" He asked after a few moments, pointing to the one that contained herself, Sephiroth and Zack.

"Oh." She said with a sad smile, "That picture. Well, in all honesty I hadn't planned on keeping it. When I found it I wanted to rip it up…" She shook her head then sighed, "But then I kept staring at Sephiroth, and I realized that he wasn't the same person who slaughtered my village…he was the great General, not a madman." She picked up the picture off the shelf and looked at it for a moment, "I think the main reason I kept it, was because I know that we're always going to remember him, but instead of remembering the insane driven monster…I would much rather remember the General of SOLDIER, I would much rather remember him before he went crazy." She sighed to herself and then set the picture back on the shelf.

"It kinda reminds you that he wasn't always crazy." Rufus mumbled more to himself than to her. He looked at the picture one last time before turning to face Tifa and settle his gaze on her.

"Yeah, it helps because it at least reminds me that he didn't go there with evil intentions." She looked at Rufus and gave him a smile, "Are you hungry?"

* * *

There was never a time where the screaming stopped. Vincent Valentine had his eyes closed as he tried to escape from the chaos around him. He could almost feel other people's pain since it never ended. Someone was always screaming, and someone was always dying. He opened his eyes when someone's screaming came to an abrupt stop. He glanced over at Cloud to see him sitting beside the bars with his back leaning against the dirt wall behind him. He was staring at the hallway, waiting for something it seemed like.

Footsteps could be heard getting louder and louder. Vincent cast his gaze to the hallway and saw that two guards were walking side by side, making their way out of the cell chamber. Behind them was a body they were dragging with rope. It was mangled and bruised up, the cut on its forehead was fresh and the stab wound in its neck was bleeding profusely, leaving a trail of blood in its wake. Vincent couldn't tell the gender of the person because they were so disfigured, they barely resembled a human being. The gunslinger looked away, now wanting to see the result of the sick minds in control there.

"Vincent." Cloud's voice broke through the silence, and Vincent turned his attention to blonde that was not looking at him, "Do you think that's going to happen to Tseng?"

"I am not sure." Vincent said after a moment of contemplation. Tseng had been taken a few days ago, and he still hadn't returned. The gunslinger wasn't sure what to think at this point, they had all been taken at some point to get the chip implanted in their heads, but none of them had ever been gone days at a time before.

"Did you hear that Rufus got lose?" Cloud said dryly, still looking at Vincent.

"Yes, I heard some guards say something about it."

"What do you think?"

"That, I am not sure of yet."

Vincent remembered when he saw Rufus for the first time while he was in here. It took him a few seconds of staring at him, but once he saw his eyes he knew who it was. He was confused to why of all people Rufus Shinra was their "favorite." He was also so curious to what had happened to Rufus because he barely resembled his old self. With Vincent's enhanced sense, he could see the scars all over the ex President's face and hands neck. The one thing Vincent noticed the most was all the scars on his forehead. When Rufus had pushed a hand through his hair all of them were visible, which only made Vincent all the more curious to why so many operations were necessary.

Vincent sighed quietly and started to rack his brain to what was happening to Tseng. They had been there for a little over a year now, and he still wasn't used to how the Organization worked. All three of them, himself, Cloud and Tseng had been taken on the same day, which was the reason they were in the same cell.

"Do you think Rufus will tell them?" Cloud asked suddenly, his eyes still attached to the outside corridor.

"No."

It was silent for a moment, he saw the looks on the blonde's face then explained himself, "Rufus has always been smart, he won't just go and tell Reeve about all of this, or AVALANCHE for that matter. If they knew, then a war would erupt. Rufus knows that the people here can't control themselves, so it would be cruel to kill them."

There was nothing else said after that. Cloud continued to stare at the hallway and Vincent closed his eyes once again, trying to ignore the outside world. He didn't want to see any of the other people that were misfortunate enough to be here. He knew that there were four little kids across from them. None of them were passed the age ten, and all of them were boys. They had attempted to speak to Cloud and Vincent before, but had been yelled at and smacked with the hilt of a guard's gun.

About an hour passed before heavy footsteps made their way over to their cell. Vincent's eye's snapped open when he heard their cell door open. The guards threw Tseng in, then closed it quickly, and then glared at all of them before walking away. Tseng had hit the ground with a small thud. He sat up and then looked at Cloud and then at Vincent. His eyes looked absolutely miserable, and he was shaking slightly.

"They lied to us." Tseng said quietly, casting his gaze to the ground. "We aren't here because we sinned." The Turk pulled up his sleeve to reveal a small green mark on his wrist. It was very curvy and looked a lot like the lifestream. "They're marking us. They're saying that the planet wants us dead, and that we need to give it its life back." He looked up to meet Vincent's and Cloud's gazes, "Anyone with Mako in them is going to be purged."

"Why doesn't anyone else have these marks?" Vincent asked while feeling a strange feeling rise in his chest.

"It's a reaction to all of the injections they've given you; by tomorrow everyone in here will have one. They're going to send _their_ actual troops to take over the WRO. They want to kill every last person who has _any_ Mako in them what-so-ever. There are people that agree with them…people that they aren't forcing. Those are the ones they're sending." Tseng took a deep breath then sighed, "They're going to find every last person who has mako, and bring them here. They don't care who it is…women, children, whoever…"

"Why are we still in here then?" Cloud asked, "Why not kill us now? Why even go through all the trouble of kidnapping us?"

"They only kidnapped the ones worth using until the end." Vincent answered for him.

* * *

New Midgar. It was so strange to say even think that's where he was headed to at that moment. He had originally just wanted to take a walk because he needed some fresh air to clear his head. But he had seen a bus that was heading to New Midgar and just couldn't help himself. He felt like he _had_ to see it.

So now he was on a bus, with his head against the glass window. He ignored all of the chatter that was going on around him and just tried to think about what exactly he was doing. He wasn't sure why he felt compelled to do something like this. However, there was a certain place he wanted to visit, he had heard a lot about it but had never been there before.

It took almost two hours to reach Sector Five of New Midgar and Rufus was more than happy to get off the bus. When he stepped off onto the ground he found that it had dropped him off in the Slums.

He felt like he should have been upset at seeing the Slums, but he wasn't. He had lived in dirt for so long that he didn't realize that most people probably weren't used to it. He walked with his hands in his pockets, and looked around at his surroundings. He wasn't sure what to make of all of it – New Midgar. It wasn't even close to being finished but it was still _here._ He had missed out on all its planning, the one thing he did say to was to keep the church.

_The Church._

He wasn't sure where it was, but he knew it was in Sector Five. He decided that it couldn't be that hard to find, so he made his way through the crowds of people that lived there and just kept walking. He wondered if the people who lived here once lived here again. Some of them looked happy while other's looked angry.

He started to get jumbled in his own thoughts again, trying his best to maneuver through the crowds. He couldn't believe that something to farfetched had actually happened. He looked up at the plate and sighed, he forgot what the slums were like – closed and dirty, just like the Organization had been.

What was the point in rebuilding Midgar if they were just going to make it the same? Rufus couldn't fathom why Reeve would just let people live like this! People were poor and sickly looking all over again! It looked just like it did all those years ago! This wasn't a "New Midgar" this was a clone of Midgar and Rufus found that he was highly disappointed.

He stopped walking when he realized he was standing in front of a door. He looked up to see a nicely rebuilt church and was surprised he had found it by himself. He pushed all of his other thoughts aside and pushed the door open. It creaked slightly and when he walked in he saw that no one else was there, and the only thing they had rebuilt was the roof. There was a huge hole in the middle of the Church filled with water, and when Rufus racked his brain to why it dawned on him that it was the water that cured Geostigma.

He walked forward and he could hear his own footsteps echo throughout the abandoned building. When he reached the water's edge he sat down and stared at it, feeling a strange feeling while gazing at it. This is the water that had saved his life, and it was all thanks to the Cetra, Aerith. He had never really paid much attention to her, until he thought it was important and even then it was mainly Hojo who wanted her so badly.

He stared at his own reflection and then gazed at the church around him. Stained glass windows were everywhere, and the light that was able to shine through giving the place a serene and holy feeling. The more and more he looked around the more he felt a strange sense of responsibility. Aerith, that girl he had disregarded so much, had saved his life three times. He might have used the escape route that his father had built when Diamond WEAPON attacked him, but he still had deadly injuries that he should have died from, yet he hadn't and he knew it was because she helped saved him. She had cured Geostigma, and she had helped him break that God forsaken connection.

"Before Geostigma, there used to be a bunch of flowers here."

The sudden voice made Rufus stand up and turn around so fast that he almost fell backwards into the water. He had his gun pulled and pointing at whoever had interrupted his thoughts without even thinking about who the voice might belong to. When his eyes met the person who had disturbed him, he almost dropped his gun.

"You okay Bossman? You seem startled, yo." Reno was standing there with his hands in his pockets, and didn't even seem fazed that there was a gun pointed at him. He was still wearing his messy businessman uniform and he was giving Rufus this look that he couldn't decipher.

Rufus slowly put down his gun and put it back in its place. He couldn't fathom the person who was in front of him. He could feel his hands shaking so he put them in his pockets so they wouldn't be noticeable. He felt his lungs start to burn at some point and he realized he had been holding his breath, he took a deep breath slowly and could feel the disbelief continue to hit him full force.

Reno, the man who annoyed him to no end, the man who was lazy and insufferable at times, the man who always showed up late – Reno, his Turk was standing right in front of him and Rufus finally understood why he had been avoiding seeing him.

It was because he had missed him, and now that he was back he wasn't sure what to do.

He was standing there in utter shock, staring at a face that he had tried so hard to forget about. His head started to throb and his throat felt restricted. This feeling of nausea swam over him and his stomach felt like it was floating. His mind couldn't even process why he was feeling this way, all he could understand at that moment was that his Turk was standing in front of him with fogged eyes.

Then a question popped into his mind, _How did Reno find me here?_

He found his voice after a few more seconds, "Reno?" He asked quietly, even though the answer was obvious. He looked exactly the same as Rufus remembered him - Red hair that was tied in a ponytail in the back, red tattoos on his cheeks and goggles on his forehead.

Instead of a sarcastic remark that he was expecting, the red head gave a small sad smile, "Yeah bossman, it's me." It was strange to Rufus to hear Reno speak in such a way, but at the moment he didn't let it linger in his mind. "Tifa said you went for a walk when I showed up…don't be mad, she called me last night and told me, anyway when I got there you were gone and when she said that I figured you'd want to see 'New' Midgar, so I took my chances and came here." His voice was even now, but there was still an underlying sadness in his tone that Rufus couldn't understand.

"I….see." Rufus said after clearing his throat. He was still trembling, and hearing Reno's voice again only made it worse. He couldn't understand what was going on! Why did he feel like this? Why was his throat close up? Why were his eyes burning?

Rufus was so caught up into his own thoughts that he didn't notice Reno walk closer to him. He snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the red head sit down beside where he was now standing. "It's just as nice as it was before, but I still liked the flowers more." Reno said with a grin, he looked up a Rufus and patted the seat next to him, "Don't worry yo, Tifa only told me so no one else should be giving you a heart attack any time soon."

Rufus nodded slowly and swallowed hard as he sat down beside his Turk. He let his eyes look at the water again, because he didn't think he could handle looking at Reno anymore. It was overwhelming him with emotions he didn't understand and he just didn't want to try to understand them at that point.

"You don't have anything to say?" Reno said after a few moments of silence.

The ex president took a deep breath and then continued to stare at the water, "I don't know what to say."

"How about you start with where you've been?" Reno said sharply, looking over at Rufus with narrowed eyes. Rufus noted that it wasn't just anger that was radiating off of Reno, it was also hurt. "Three and a half years Rufus." Reno said slowly, "You _have_ to have something to say." He said the last sentence quietly, and Rufus was almost taken aback by the statement.

The ex president racked his brain what to say, something, _anything_. He looked over at his Turk finally and said quietly, "I missed you Reno."

Whether that's what Reno wanted to hear or not, Rufus didn't know. But after a moment of silence, the red headed Turk's mouth turned upward into a small smiled. "Don't get to mushy yo, it's weird."

* * *

_I had some trouble writing this, because it was so strange to be actually writing again I guess. I'd really appreciate some feedback, and I hope this chapter is at least slightly enjoyable._

_-Crimson_

_**And remember, check out JenesisX! They're awesome.**_


	5. Chapter 5: Remission

_Thank you so much for your reviews. I really appreciate it. Feedback always helps and motivates a writer! :]_

_Sorry for the really late update, I've been busy with school and moving. _

_I hope ya enjoy!_

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Five – Remission

_So much pain._

"What should we do with him?"

"We need to keep him alive." A voice drawled slowly, "He, Valentine and Strife are the key to getting Rufus Shinra back, we need them alive."

"What is so special about him?! He's just a washed out-"

"The planet gave him a second chance, and I need to know why. No matter what I've done, no matter how dangerous the mission was he never died – Why is it that the planet keeps him here?" The voice sounded insulted, maybe even hurt.

Tseng's eyes fluttered open suddenly, and he was relieved that he was back in reality for the time being. He didn't know how much time had passed since he had been able to rationally think, and he wasn't even sure where he was. His head was throbbing and he could feel blood trickle down from the new wound on his forehead. His stomach felt like it was in a tight knot and he felt like he could barely breathe. Every breath he took made his chest tighten up.

_So cold._

The pain started to resurface in his mind and before he realized it he heard himself start scream uncontrollably. His vision started to blur and the only thing he was conscious of was the pain he felt all over his body. His veins felt on fire and the pain in his head made him feel like he would explode any second.

His vision changed from the room he was in, and he knew now he was no longer in reality. He felt the process happen all over again. The shoes he had seen moment ago were replaced by a street.

He was walking up a doorstep and opening it without warning. He was met with the sight of a little girl holding a stuffed moogle against her chest. She was questioning him with her innocent brown eyes, but before she could even open her mouth, he shot her dead in the chest. She tumbled down the stairs and landed with a loud thud. A blood pool started to form out from under her, and her eyes were dead and cold.

Her mother came running in the room and screamed at the sight she saw. She looked at him with pained and angry eyes, and right as he shot her as well, she screamed _"Monster!" _She fell beside her daughter, and he only stood there a moment longer to make sure no one else was in the house. He didn't spare the mother and daughter another glance as he walked out of the door.

It was like he was being forced to watch his sins over and over again.

Tseng felt like he was losing his mind. He couldn't escape from himself – he saw every innocent person he killed, and it seemed the more and more blood he spilled, the more it stained his mind. He heard someone speak, but he couldn't hear what they said. It sounded like a soft buzzing in the back of his mind.

To Tseng it seemed that not even a second later that he hit a hard surface. He lay there, not even attempting to move, because he wasn't in that room, or wherever they had thrown him. He was walking down a different street now. He could still feel the pain. His heart was racing and instead of feeling cold like he had a minute ago he felt like his whole body was on fire. Every breath he took felt like it was killing him – he just wanted it to end.

He wanted to die.

* * *

Rufus wasn't sure to be relived or nervous as he and Reno made their way down the sidewalk leading to the Seventh Heaven. No words had been exchanged between the two of them on their way back, and Rufus was almost positive it was because Reno's nerves were just as wrecked as his own. He knew that the red head had been sneaking glances at him every few minutes, and the ex President felt a small pang of guilt for the disbelief that Reno held.

Rain started to pour down as the two of them made it under the safety of the Seventh Heaven's roof. Rufus' nerves were beyond wrecked at this point and it was painfully obvious that Reno's were as well. The ex president wanted to say something, but his voice betrayed him. What words could be exchanged that made the situation any better? He couldn't think of any sarcasm or jokes – he couldn't think of anything. It was then he realized how much the Organization had an impact on him. He had been so used to not talking, that it was almost like he forgot how.

Reno's voice broke through his sudden stream of thoughts, "After this…" he gestured to the bar behind them, "are you coming back to Junon?" The question was simple, but Rufus felt like he was being hit by a bus as he contemplated what was just asked of him.

Rufus felt a small feeling rise in his chest, and he wasn't sure what it was. Was he ready to go around seeing everyone he tried to forget? Seeing Reno again made him feel like the world had suddenly started spinning upside down. He wasn't sure how he would react to seeing all of them. However, he knew what the real problem was – he _wouldn't_ be seeing all of them. There would be an empty place where Tseng should be, and Rufus wasn't sure he could handle that in his state of mind.

He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. He cast his Turk a look of uncertainty and then walked in the bar, not even giving Reno a chance to try and pester him. He could feel the stare he was receiving from the red head, and Rufus was thankful he didn't have to see his face.

When he stepped into the bar he almost stopped dead in his tracks and walked back outside. But he couldn't do that because Reno was directly behind him, and he probably wouldn't have gotten far anyway. Reeve and Yuffie Kisaragi were sitting at the bar, and of course their eyes landed on him. He stopped in the middle of the bar and looked at them, not sure what to say. He was surprised when Reno merely walked passed him and went to sit next to Reeve, he didn't even look over at Rufus, he just sat down and faced the bar.

"Wow." Yuffie said bluntly, "What the hell happened to you?" She crossed her arms and then cast a glance over her shoulder to Tifa, who was standing behind the bar, getting ready for the evening rush – "You said this is him? Doesn't even look like him." She mumbled the last part and then gave Rufus a one over look. She stopped at his eyes, and he saw her smirk, "It really is you." She said with a shrug, she looked over at Reeve and rolled her eyes at him, "C'mon Reeve, got nothing to say to your VP?"

Reeve ignored her and continued to stare at Rufus. He had a misty look in his eyes and he didn't seem to even be listening to the ninja next to him. After a few awkward moments of silence, he finally smiled. "Welcome back." He said evenly, not taking his eyes off the ex president in front of him. "I'm glad to see you're in good health."

For some odd reason, Rufus frowned. Good health? He looked like he was in good health? Could they not see? Were they not able to understand that he was a monster? He gave Reeve a nod of acknowledgement, and then walked over to the bar to sit a few seats away. He didn't know why, but he couldn't find his voice.

Did everyone think he was alright?

He held back a bitter laugh as he stared at his hands resting on the bar. All he saw was innocent blood that he could have never even ordered his Turk's to kill. All he saw was scars and death – what did everyone else see? Some man that was in "good health" because he wasn't spewing out his guts? Could they not see the scarring on his mind? Could they not see anything? Were they blind?

He was happy to see that Reeve at least seemed happy to see him, and he wasn't too surprised by Yuffie's reaction. Somehow though, he felt slightly bitter. He couldn't help it, the feeling came up and was almost like an acidic feeling in his throat, and it started eating at him. Were they all ignorant enough to believe he was alright?

"Do you know where they are?" Yuffie's voice broke through his thoughts, and he realized that within the time he had been thinking, she had moved over and sat next to him. Her black hair was now shoulder length long and she had even adapted a new style of clothing. Her short shorts were gone and replaced with black jeans, and her knee high boots were not down to the ankle. She wore a gray shirt that was loose around her shoulders and it was apparent to Rufus that she was no longer a teenager anymore. When he looked at her eyes he saw a strange fire in them, almost like she was ready to burst. He didn't say anything, because he wasn't sure what _to_ say. He couldn't go around telling people where they were being held captive – he couldn't be the cause of innocent people dying.

"You don't have a fucking answer?" She said bluntly, ignoring the stares she was now receiving from everyone. He could feel the anger radiating off of her, and he himself started to get a little pissed off at the girl. He tried to ignore her, and hoped she would go, but of course she didn't. "Where the hell are they?!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. She slammed her fists on the bar counter with her statement, and she looked ready to attack him.

"Yuffie!" Tifa interjected, walking over and giving her friend a small glare, "You need to calm down right now –"

"Sorry Tifa! I'm not gonna sit here and not do anything!" The small ninja interrupted her friend and gave Rufus her full attention again. "Tell me where they are." She said again, still glaring at him.

Rufus found that he was more than a little pissed by this point. His hands had clenched into fists without him realizing it, and he started to feel hot. He couldn't answer her, and he was more than pissed because he didn't understand _who_ the hell she thought she was.

"If you don't say something, I swear I'm going to – "

"Shut. The. Hell. Up." Rufus emphasized each word slowly, his voice shaking in the process. He finally turned to face her, and he held her gaze with his own glare.

"Who the hell do you think you are!?" She screamed at his face. He could see that her eyes were starting to water, and it suddenly dawned on him that she must have been trying her best to hold herself together. "You can't just disappear for three and half years and then suddenly reappear like nothing fucking happened! You were where my friends are at! And I will _beat_ the fucking answer out of you if you don't start talking soon!" She was so close he could feel her breath on his face.

"That's enough chick." Reno hopped off his barstool and then walked over to where Rufus and the ninja were sitting. He placed his hands on Yuffie's shoulders and then pushed her away slowly. "Throwing tantrums isn't going to solve anything, yo."

"Shut the fuck up turkey, I want to know where my friends are!" Her grey eyes seemed to be storming and Rufus was almost captivated by the emotions she wasn't afraid to show. He looked at Reno who was now staring at him. Suddenly Yuffie took a deep breath and then looked Rufus dead in the face, her voice was defeated, "I just want them back." She looked at Reno then, "You spent three and a half years looking for Rufus, you never gave up…any lead you went after. I'm just doing what you did…Tseng's gone too, don't you want him back?" She was now looking at both of them, her voice sounding more childlike as it used to.

Reno looked at Rufus once again and then nodded his head toward the door, "Let's go yo."

The ex president stood up slowly, and almost lost his footing when he realized he was trembling. He shoved his hands in his pockets and tried to clear his mind of the place he no longer had to be a part of. As both he and Reno walked across the hardwood flooring the echo of their footsteps seemed deadly. The bell rang as the door opened, and it was then Yuffie decided to speak once more;

"If they die Rufus Shinra, you will be no better than the people that took them."

The door slammed behind them with that and Rufus felt his breath get caught in his throat. The rain was still pouring down in a never ending torrent and it seemed to be representing the mess of a mind that was possessed by Rufus Shinra. Reno stopped walking when they reached the porch, the door closed behind them and the red head turned around to face the ex president.

Rufus said nothing and thought back to the event that had just unfolded. What was he suppose to do?

He had to do what Miles said; he had to destroy the machine they used.

"Bossman?" Reno's voice broke through the thoughts bouncing around in Rufus' head, "Junon?"

The ex president was still for a moment. His mind went to locked away faces that he had tried to forget. Elena and Rude – Tseng wouldn't be there, but those two would be. He reflected on how everyone had said that they'd never given up, that they kept looking. He took a deep breath and then nodded, "Alright." He said, his voice betraying no emotion.

He just hoped he was ready to be crushed.

* * *

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"It wasn't my idea, it was the planets."

"Yeah but…." Zack scratched his head, "I dunno…"

Aerith smiled over at her companion, "Well, that's what it wants, so we can't deny it that. We're the messengers."

The raven haired man nodded, "Well, I guess we should go find him."

* * *

The ride to Junon was very smooth, both physically and mentally. Reno hadn't pressed him with questions or even said much. He commented on how Junon looked the same for the most part, aside from the drop in population. However, other than that there wasn't a lot to say.

"Be warned," Reno began suddenly, "Elena might end up pestering you about where you've been eventually…a few things changed once you were gone. She and Tseng…well he put a ring on it."

Rufus blinked stupidly for a moment, "You mean they got engaged?"

"Yeah. So, I'm just warning you that she's gonna want to know…"

Rufus nodded and then thought back to what Reno had just told him. He shouldn't have been surprised considering Tseng and Elena had always had a thing for each other, yet thinking about how life really did move on hit him in a strange way. He thought back to how Elena had always seemed like a puppy following Tseng around and almost smiled at the memory.

The city was in sight a few moments later and Rufus felt his stomach turn when he saw the WRO building. He hadn't seen that building since he had been taken. He looked over at Reno who was staring straight ahead, silent.

"Ya know," Reno started, "Reeve wants to organize a welcome back party for you, he sent me a text earlier saying that he thinks it will be good for the public."

"Good for the public? Why would that be so 'good' for them? So they can see me and wonder why they're loved ones aren't back?" Rufus rolled his eyes, "Tell Reeve no."

"It's not suppose to make them wonder, it's suppose to give them hope."

"Hope? Hope for what? They'll think I bought myself out, or they'll think that the WRO found me." He shook his head, "That's a stupid idea, I won't do it."

Reno glanced over at the ex President and narrowed his eyes slightly, "I wasn't asking you whether you wanted to or not. I was telling you of an idea that Reeve told me." It grew silent for a few seconds, and as the helicopter landed on the top of the WRO building, Reno spoke again. "We looked for you for three years – I banged on every front door I could find. I looked in places that almost got me killed, so did Elena, so did Rude, and members of AVALANCHE did too. You can't even tell us where you were so we can save the other people we've lost – so you can at least give something back to the people who have been sitting and wondering for the past three years, you can at least give them hope, whether you think it's stupid or not."

Rufus glanced over at the red head and he hopped out of the helicopter. He couldn't help but feel a little angry at the sudden 'party' that they wanted to plan, and he felt a little agitated with Reno's reaction. Couldn't at least one person understand that the last thing that the world needed was some trophy?

Rufus slid out of the helicopter and landed with a small thump. They were on top of the WRO building and even though Rufus had been there at least fifty times before, he felt like he had no idea where he was. He looked over at Reno was standing by the door that lead to the lower levels, waiting for him.

He made his way over there and then thought back to what was said a few moments ago. "I just don't think that my face will suddenly change the world. I don't think it will help people sleep better at night."

Reno shrugged, "It wasn't my idea, it was Reeves. I'm just telling you that everyone has worked hard and if this is the one request you get, you should just do it."

They walked down the stairs in silence. Reno's attitude had almost changed completely from being friendly to almost hostile. When they walked down a few flight of stairs Rufus felt his chest tighten up with anxiety. The building felt the same, looked the same, and even smelled the same – he thought back to all the times he had climbed the stairs he was now walking down and all the times he walked through the hallways. It felt unreal.

Reno stopped suddenly, which made Rufus almost run into him. He saw that his Turk's hand was on the doorknob they were standing in front of and he could feel a strange aura pulsing away from him. "Can you at least tell me anything that might mean something?" His voice was quiet and dull, and slowly he turned around to face the ex president.

Rufus blinked and then felt his hands start to shake. He shoved them in his pockets and then tried to look Reno in the face. He hadn't actually looked at him the whole time they'd been on the way to Junon, and it was then he realized that he had black circles under his eyes, and how he looked exhausted. His red hair was more of a mess than what he remembered, and it was almost like looking at a shade of a person.

"I was being held where everyone else is." Rufus said quietly, his mind trying not to break with memories of the horrid place he didn't even want to think about. He felt his insides twist and turn and all of a sudden he felt like he was going to hurl.

"What does that mean though?" Reno pestered, his voice starting to regain some of its power.

"It means that I know where everyone is." Rufus said while trying his best to keep his composure. The thought of that place began to terrify him in ways that he didn't realize. Reno's blue green eyes were on him and waiting and finally Rufus started to slip away from the humanity that he had held onto for the three years.

He felt his control slip away, and suddenly he didn't care if people saw him for what he was. He was nothing but a shell of a man. He owned a mind that was scarred and broken and he couldn't begin to even understand how to get passed what he was feeling.

"Bossman?" He heard Reno's voice but he didn't see him anymore. His vision started to flicker with memories and he felt so sick that he had to grab his sides to keep himself from screaming. He felt someone grab his shoulders but he didn't know where he was anymore. "Rufus!" He could hear Reno's voice but he couldn't see anything. He felt himself slip away from reality and slowly everything around him felt fuzzy and unreal.

He could feel the vague feeling of someone shaking him, and the echo of a voice – but he was gone.

Rufus Shinra broke.

* * *

_This took forever again. I can't believe how slow I am. I was in the process of moving three states away, graduating high school and other stupid stuff. But now I should be good to go and am in the process of working on the other chapter as we speak!_

_Please be patient and I promise that from now on there will be an update at least once a week, if not more._

_**Also, if anyone is interested and has some free time, I would really like to make an actual book cover for this story. I would love to have Rufus look like the one I've described and if anyone ever wants to take a stab at it, please PM me and I would LOVE to hear any ideas. **  
_

_-Crimson_


	6. Chapter 6: Suggestions

_Alright, like I said I was in the process of writing the next chapter, so here it goes. I hope that you enjoyed the last one. Honestly, the ending of that chapter wasn't planned to be that way, but I thought that the story needs to take a turn so that way people can see how much Rufus's mind was affected. _

_Feedback is wonderful and I hope you will take the time to tell me what you think! I love reviews, they're what helps a writer go on! So please give feedback, it's great motivation._

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Six – Suggestions

Darkness, it was all that surrounded him. It was as if he was floating in a black sea, but without the water. There was no sign of life detectable besides his own shallow breathing. He opened and closed his eyes, hoping that it would somehow make the darkness go away, but it didn't. He continued to float there in what seemed a never ending shadow.

He had been reliving his memories since he could remember, ones that were sad, happy, angry and pained. However, he knew that this darkness wasn't a memory; it was something that he wasn't familiar with. It was something outside of the confinements of his own shattered mind.

He hadn't dealt with another soul since he entered the lifestream. He hadn't seen anyone or felt anyone; he immediately shut himself off and began a slumber which contained nothing but his own past. In his own memories however, he would see his past comrades and his past enemies, but he merely watched the memories flutter by, he never interacted with them.

What was he doing here? He looked around him once more, trying to look for any sign of light. Was he asleep? Was this a nightmare? He closed his eyes for a moment and thought of all the possibilities, but he came up short because this couldn't be death, he had already died.

He hated the feeling that was starting to rise in his chest – vulnerability.

"What is this place?" he asked out loud, after glancing around once again.

"_It's in between life and death."_

He fell silent and the feeling in his chest only seemed to worsen.

"_You're being called upon by the planet." _

"Gaia doesn't want me; I've been the instrument in a lot of its damage."

"_Sins can be repented, with the right action."_

"There is nothing I can do to repent what I have done."

"_The planet doesn't seem to think so, or it wouldn't be calling upon you." _

"I've killed." He said after a few seconds of awkward silence, "I've caused a lot of heartache."

"_Why?"_

It was just a question, but he felt like he was the most difficult thing he ever had to think about. He opened and closed his fists, hoping that maybe he could just close his eyes and he'd be back to reliving his memories. But nothing happened, and finally he just sighed quietly and shook his head slightly.

"I don't know." His voice was quiet, and he felt like he was talking more to himself then the entity that was speaking to him. "I saw what I was doing, I could feel everything around me, but…" he thought for a moment and started to feel like he was losing a battle inside of himself.

"_But what?"_

"But I couldn't stop. My conscious thoughts and objections never reached my physical body."

He was met with silence, and after a few more seconds he finally decided that he was a prisoner of his own mind. That voice belonged to nothing and no one but his subconscious. He felt the vulnerability start to fade away and he was glad, he wasn't used to being vulnerable.

"_It has made its choice."_

He jumped from the sudden sound. "What?" He asked calmly, believing that nothing around him was actually real.

"_Sephiroth, Gaia needs your help and it will be your chance to repent."_

Suddenly, he didn't feel as if this was just inside his own head. "What does that mean?" Why was he starting to feel sleepy?

"_Good luck."_

With the parting words the great General's eyes began to close, and right before he fell into a dreamless sleep, he was almost sure he felt raindrops on his face.

* * *

_Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep._

What was that annoying beeping sound? Rufus's eyes snapped open suddenly, and he sat up in the same split second. Where was he? How did he get here? He glanced around the room and felt his insides start to twist and turn. He was in a hospital room.

His mind went in a million different places but before he could make a decision of what to do, the door opened and the red headed Turk Reno walked in. He stopped when he saw that Rufus was awake, and grinned slightly. "Calm down, yo. It's a private sector."

Rufus felt his breathing start to go back to normal and he started to relaxed. He hadn't been worried about being in a hospital with other people, he had just been afraid because it reminded him of_ that _place. He looked down at his appearance and saw that he had on sweat pants and a loose t-shirt with an IV hooked up to him. He looked over to see that Reno had plopped himself in the chair beside the bed, and was staring at the ex president.

"Why am I here?" Rufus was completely confused at this point. He looked at Reno who seemed to be hesitating to say something, and while the ex president waited he realized that all the anger that the red head had seemed to have earlier was gone.

Reno scratched his head and sighed, "Well….you kinda passed out."

"Kinda?"

"No. You passed out completely."

The ex president thought back to what could have happened and after he replayed the events that he remembered in his head he was left empty handed. He couldn't remember anything after walking into the WRO building. He looked at his Turk, "Why?"

Reno sat there for a few seconds, looking like he was contemplating something. He looked at Rufus and shrugged, "I guess you were just tired. We had just walked into the hallway…and you passed out."

Rufus felt a strange sensation swarm through him. He looked Reno over and then thought over that day again. He remembered getting out of the helicopter, he remembered walking down the stairs into the building, but that was it. He couldn't remember anything after that.

Was Reno lying to him?

"I just passed out, out of nowhere?" He asked the red head, starting to feel suspicious.

"Yeah, yo!" Reno said, laughing a little this time. "We were walking through the hallway and out of nowhere you fell! You hadn't slept though right? You had to have just been exhausted. Probably from seeing me, Yuffie and Reeve….it was probably too much." He shrugged and then grinned.

Rufus thought it over for a few moments. Reno was right, he hadn't slept, and seeing everyone so fast did take a toll on him. He looked at the red head and then finally decided to believe him. What else could it have been about? He continued to look at him and for some reason it looked like Reno was _really_ trying to convince him.

"Bossman, seriously." Reno started after Rufus didn't look completely convinced, "Why would I lie about that?"

Rufus just nodded, the other man was right. Why would he lie?

* * *

"Cloud."

Who was talking to him?

"Cloud!"

Cloud's eyes snapped open, and he was greeted to the sight of Vincent towering over him. "What?" He said after a few seconds of the two staring at each other, "Did they take Tseng again?" He felt his stomach start to twist with the thought.

"No." He nodded his head toward Cloud, "He's asleep behind you." He stared at the blond for a few moments, and the swordsmen felt his skin start to crawl.

"Vincent? What is it?" He asked after a few seconds of trying to figure out what was wrong with the gunslinger.

"Something's wrong."

Cloud waited for him to elaborate, but no response was forth coming. He stood up slowly, and then glanced outside of their cell. There were no guards patrolling, and oddly enough it was quiet. Cloud wrapped his hand around one of the cold bars, and then tried to glance at other people who seemed to be just as confused as they were.

Cloud was about to turn and face Vincent when suddenly an alarm started to scream. He jumped back slightly, and then looked over at his comrade who was now walking over to Tseng. "Get up." Vincent's gruff voice said as he shook the Turk.

Suddenly, the swordsmen heard someone scream. Gunfire started to go off, and before Cloud could even process what was happening completely, the lights shut off. He had never been thankful for his mako enhanced senses until that moment.

"What the fuck is going on?" Tseng's voice broke through Cloud's confusion and he shook his head in response.

The alarm was steady going off, and then he felt Vincent come up to the other side of him. "Vince..do you think Rufus?"

"No."

The alarm was still blaring, and at that moment Cloud seriously considered trying to break out of the place. He was about to ask his comrades what they thought, but then the door that closed the cells into the hallway busted off of its hinges and flew passed their cell.

A dark figure appeared in front of their cell a moment later, and before Cloud could process what was going on they spoke, "Move back." The blonde froze. He knew that voice. Vincent pulled on Cloud's arm, pulling him away from the cell bars.

In one quick movement the bars were sliced in half, and when Cloud saw the weapon the mystery person was using, he felt like he couldn't breathe. They took a step toward the trio, and finally once the blonde concentrated enough he could make out the figure.

"Good evening Cloud." Their voice drawled, Cloud felt himself start to grow hot.

"You son of a bitch." He muttered so quietly it sounded deadly.

They gave no reply and before Cloud could even register what was happening he saw the figure come toward him, and all he saw was black.

* * *

_I know it's rushed, but I was in a stage with not knowing what to do with the story. I hope you enjoy the choice I made about who broke into the Organization to get to Cloud, Vincent and Tseng. I know I haven't really shinned the light on how terrible they are, and it's because I really want to just focus on Rufus._

_Please review._

_-Crimson._


	7. Chapter 7: White Knuckles

_Thank you for the reviews! It really helps me want to keep writing. _

_Well, I hope I see reviews for this chapter too. x)_

_Also, I know that I forgot to put the break lines last chapter, I fixed that so you can now tell when the scene changes. Sorry about that. Also, I tried to make this chapter extra long because the last one was short. _

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Seven – White Knuckles

"You can use this; it should work on any scarring."

Rufus nodded at the doctor who was looking at his forehead, neck and arms. He raised an eyebrow at the ex president but didn't comment. He handed a small bottle to him and then looked him over once more. "Well, other than that you seem fine, vitals are fine, heart is strong." He stepped back and then nodded, "Try and to stay away from stress, get some rest, and be sure to eat. Other than that, you seem fine."

The ex president nodded. He wouldn't have used the word fine, but if that was what it took to get out of the hospital, he'd take it with open arms. Even when he was 'the high and mighty Rufus Shinra,' he had never liked hospitals. They were swarming with sick people and it smelled terrible. How was someone supposed to get better if they _were _sick, if they were around sick people? Plus, he couldn't stand someone walking in, looking at him, and then deciding what was wrong, or what wasn't wrong. So when the doctor said he could leave and that his clothes were in the cabinet, he was more than happy.

Reno was standing outside; thankfully the doctor had ordered him out before he started to look him over. One thing that the doctor had been concerned with was a small dark spot on the frontal lope of Rufus's brain. He had wanted to do an MRI or CAT scan, but the ex president quickly dismissed it and said he had already had it checked out _years_ ago and it was nothing more than a stain from a concussion.

"Bossman?" Reno's voice came through the door, making him sound slightly muffled, "You ready yet, yo?"

Rufus quickly found his clothes; thankful for the attire instead of the flimsy shirt and sweat pants he had been assigned. He changed quickly, looking at himself in the mirror for one split second before dismissing it and deciding he didn't care what he looked like. He slipped the small bottle of lotion that the doctor had given him in his pocket, and was out the door in the next second.

Reno was leaning against the wall beside the door, and rolled his eyes when he finally saw Rufus emerge. "Finally, this place always makes my skin crawl." The ex president nodded in agreement, and started to walk through the hallway toward the exit. He knew that Reno's eyes were burning in his back, but he ignored it and continued to walk through the many different hallways, looking for the exit.

Eventually Reno was in step beside him, "So, Reeve really wants to throw that party." His voice sounded a little sheepish, and Rufus felt his chest twist. "I told him what you said, but he really wants to do it."

Rufus didn't comment on the subject, he merely started to walk slightly faster. He saw the huge glass doors and felt slightly relieved. The air was starting to feel stuffy. The door opened automatically when they approached it, and once they were finally outside the ex president felt like he could breathe again.

"Bossman?"

"I don't want to." Rufus said, hoping that the red head would just leave it alone.

"I know. But I think you should…"

Rufus was about to reply when someone's voice interrupted him. "Oh my god! Is that Rufus Shinra!?" Both he and Reno looked in the direction of the voice and saw that it belonged to a woman escorting her child to the hospital. She was staring at him, and her little girl was as well.

"Yes ma'am it is!" Reno said sharply and rather loud. The ex president shot a glare over to the red head and clenched his fists slightly.

The woman approached them slowly, and she stopped when she was a few feet away from them. "Well," She began, "it's not the face I wanted to see, but it's something." She gave them a tight smile and started to walk away. "Come on, Valeria." She said to the little girl who was still standing in front of the duo.

"Welcome back Mr. Shinra." She smiled at him and then walked over to her mother, who seemed to be scolding her on the way into the hospital.

He wasn't sure why, but he felt his chest start to twist in a strange bittersweet way. He looked over at Reno who was kicking his foot against the pavement and had his hands in his pockets. He looked up at Rufus and then nodded his head up the street, "Ya ready to give this another shot?"

Rufus followed his head movement and when his eyes landed on the WRO, the bittersweet feeling was replaced with anxiety. His stomach felt like it was starting to float with just the small thought of walking into the building. He let his eyes land on the big glass window on the right side of the building, where his office used to be and he had to suppress a shudder.

He merely gave Reno a nod, and slowly the two made their way through the streets of Junon. He felt people's eyes burn in his back, and for a split second he was confused to why all of a sudden everyone knew who he was. He had traveled before on missions for the Organization and no one ever recognized him.

He let his eyes land on Reno for a moment, and it was then it clicked in his head. They recognized Reno. Not only had Reno always been by his side when there was a national announcement when Shin-Ra was in control, he had looked three years for him. Everyone said that the red head had gone door to door, and if that was the case the public had to be used to seeing him by now, and knew who he was looking for.

Reno grinned at him, "C'mon, don't look so tense." He said lowly, "All eyes are on you, at least give them something to talk about."

Rufus glanced over at his companion, shaking his head. "I think they already have a great deal to talk about." He muttered.

The streets started gain more and more people, and even though it wasn't quite what it used to be - it was still enough to where Reno had to grab onto Rufus's arm and help guide him through the crowds of people that started to emerge.

"That's Rufus Shinra!"

"No way, it can't be."

"Wow."

"Is that really him?"

"Doesn't really look like him…"

"Yeah it is, look at the body guard with him."

Rufus thought his head was going to explode. He hadn't had such attention in years, and he wasn't quite sure how to handle it. He felt his heart beat start to rise and his chest started to twist and turn even more. He felt Reno's grip on his arm tighten and slowly he felt his head start to spin.

"Hey!" One of the many people grabbed his arm, "Where is everyone!?"

Reno quickly looked at the man and shook his head, "Sir, you're going to have to let go."

"Let go!? I want to know where my son is!" His grip on Rufus's arm tightened, and if the ex president was correct he saw that the man's eyes were glossed over. "We deserve to know!"

For some reason time seemed to stop. Rufus looked at the man and he couldn't get rid of the guilt that was starting to grow in the pit of his stomach. The man's face was wrinkled, especially around his eyes. He noted the black rings under them as well, and for some reason Rufus felt so sorry for him that it was impossible for him to ignore him. The feeling of empathy overwhelmed him, and instead of yanking his arm away and walking away, he smiled at the man.

He turned to face him, Reno's grip on his other arm still tight. The old man let go of his other arm, and Rufus held out his hand to him. He hesitated for a moment, but grabbed the ex president's hand. "I'm Rufus Shinra." He said slowly, and his mind flashed to all the times he'd watch his father deal with unhappy people, and all the times he dealt with them as well. "What's your son's name?" He asked as he shook the man's hand.

The old man looked at Rufus, and just as he suspected tears started to stream down the older man's face. "It's…it's Alan."

He kept the smile on his face, and for one second he felt like he had never left in the first place. For one moment, he felt like the high and mighty Rufus Shinra.

His voice was even and back to its velvety tone and even though he couldn't see his own appearance he was sure that his eyes looked just as calm and collected just like they used to. "I personally promise you the safety of your son," He saw that the man was speechless, and instead of walking away he continued, "I can't promise you when, but I will promise you his return. What is your name?"

They slowly let their hands fall back to their sides and the ghost of a smile adored the old man's face. "My name's Henry…Henry Hughes."

Rufus nodded, "Well, Mr. Hughes, I will see you in the near future."

"T-Thank you Mr. Shinra."

He and Reno started to walk away then. People were still staring at them, and the whispers were still buzzing. Rufus wasn't sure how he should have been feeling, but at that moment he couldn't help but feel almost like his old self. Attention was something he had always craved, and at this moment _all_ eyes were on him. For the longest time he had been eerie about showing his face in public, or letting them know who he was. At that moment, he couldn't remember why he was so scared.

When they finally walked into the front doors of the WRO building Reno let go of his arm. The red head's eyes were on him, "So, what the hell was that?"

Rufus looked over at his companion, "What are you talking about?"

"How can you promise someone that you'll return their kid, if you can't even tell us where you were?" The anger in his voice was very evident, and when Rufus knew that by the look on the red head's voice that he was also hurt.

"It's what needed to be done at that moment." He answered simply, not seeing the big deal.

"Are you back to that?" Reno said coldly, "Telling people what they want to hear so they'll leave you alone?"

Rufus was more than taken aback. He narrowed at his eyes at the other man and felt his blood start to boil. "I'm sick and tired of your attitude." He said quietly. Employees started to walk past them, giving them a strange look but still sticking to their own business.

"I'm sick of your secrecy. I could understand it with Reeve, and that ninja chick – but I don't understand it with me." Reno's eyes were narrowed, and even though Rufus had seen him angry before, it was usually never directed at him. "I've known you since I was fifteen; I thought we were closer than that."

Rufus glanced around them, and noticed that people were starting to stop and stare. "Reno, this isn't the place to have this conversation." He felt his heart turn in a strange way when he saw the hurt that flashed through Reno's eyes, but the last thing he wanted was to cause a scene in the WRO lobby.

Without a word the Turk started to walk over to the elevator, Rufus followed him silently, feeling strange with the atmosphere change. When the elevator door opened they walked into it and took their places on opposite walls. The tension in the air was thick, and Rufus ended up just casting his eyes to the floor.

The confident feeling he had moments ago was gone. The feeling of once again knowing how to handle himself and handle others was gone. For one moment he felt his authority was back – and he knew his words and opinions had mattered. However, it was gone the second he had seen Reno's hurt and confusion.

"I'm sorry." He finally said, feeling strange because he couldn't remember the last time he had actually apologized to someone and meant it. He glanced up at Reno to see that the red head wasn't even looking at him.

"It's fine, yo"

"Reno…"

"No. It's fine." Then suddenly, the red head changed his mind. "No, it's not fine." He met Rufus's gaze with his own and glared. "I've looked for you for years, and you don't even have the decency to explain to me what the hell is going on."

Rufus felt himself snap. "I didn't ask you to look for me." His voice was harsher than he intended, and before he could even apologize Reno laughed at him.

"I didn't have to take care of you when you had geostigma either. But I did, and you know what? Right now I wish I hadn't."

The elevator doors opened, and suddenly Rufus felt very out of place. He looked at the Turk standing in front of him, and without even thinking he walked out. He felt his heart start to beat fast and he walked down the first hallway he saw. He heard footsteps behind him which only made him walk faster. He walked down any hallway he saw, taking every twist and turn possible.

He stopped when he reached a door, and when he looked over his shoulder he saw that no one was behind him. He took a few steps back, and realized he had walked to his old office. He looked at the huge oak door, and remembered when he told Reeve the only way he was going to even consider being a vice president, was if he had the same president's office from his old company. It had taken a lot of convincing, and eventually Rufus agreed that he'd take part in the WRO only because at the time, he needed some type of authority.

He placed his hand on the door handle and opened it slowly, expecting everything to be packed up in boxes, or maybe even gone. When he walked in though he stopped dead in his tracks, his eyes widened and he felt his hands start to tremble.

Everything was exactly how he remembered. He walked forward, drinking in every inch of what was once his. He stopped in the middle of the room, and stared at the desk that was dead ahead. Three and a half years ago, he had been sitting at that desk making plans to rebuild Midgar. Three and a half years ago he had been sitting there talking to Tseng. Three and a half years ago, he had been himself, and at the moment he was in now…he honestly had no idea who he was anymore.

He felt the trembling start to increase, so he stuffed his hands in his pockets, hoping that he'd just calm down. He glanced over at the couch that was to his right, and remembered all the times Reno had come to bother him and ended up just passing out there. There was a wardrobe next to the couch, and remembered always keeping a suit in there in case something had happened to the one he would be wearing.

He walked toward the wardrobe, and slowly he pulled his hands out of his pockets and set them on the handles. He took a deep breath and opened it, and to his surprise there was a white suit hanging there in a plastic cover. He stared at it for a moment, and then looked at his appearance.

He was Rufus Shinra; he shouldn't look like such a refugee. He wasn't supposed to look like the Turks, or a member of AVALANCHE. He was suppose to look like someone who mattered, and even though he had grown accustomed to being no one in the past three years, there was a part of him that craved being who he used to be.

He grabbed the hanger and brought it out of the wardrobe, and stared at it for a few moments longer. Reeve was under the impression that his presence would help the public, and if that was the case, what exactly did they need? Did they need someone who looked and acted like he did now? Or did they need someone professional?

Rufus debated the question for what felt like forever, before he finally realized why Reeve was how he was. Even though he was a member of AVALANCHE, he always presented himself in a manner that made people think that he knew what he was doing. He was the president of the present major company in the world, and even though he could present himself in any way he wanted, he did it in the way that made people feel comfortable.

That's what the public always needed.

He glanced over his shoulder to look at the door that led to the private bathroom, and with one last glace at the suite in his hands, he slowly started to make his way over there. He felt his heart pound in his chest, and when he was finally standing on the ceramic tile, he slowly closed the door.

He hung the suit on the back of the door, and then glanced at himself in the mirror.

It was time to say goodbye to the past three years.

* * *

The situation was more than awkward, even for the greatest General of all time.

Sephiroth was standing in front of the window that belonged to their hotel room at the Icicle Inn. He had carried Cloud all the way down there, figuring out that not only had they been held captive for a year, they had also lost most of their strength. Vincent Valentine was sitting on one of the four beds that accompanied the room, resting against the headboard, keeping his eyes on the wall. Tseng was passed out on another bed, which was also the same thing Strife was doing.

"We have to think of a way to break this." Vincent's voice broke through the silence that had settled over them, and slowly Sephiroth turned around to face him. He waited for him to continue, and when the gunslinger realized that the silver headed man wasn't going to ask why, he decided to continue. "It's based off impulses. So if they see us, they still have control over us."

The ex general thought for a moment. "Have you tried to break it with electricity?" It was a simple question, and even though he didn't care that much, he understood that this was his mission and the only way to gain redemption.

"We haven't really had the chance." The gunslinger finally said.

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow.

"If they tell us to do things, we have to do them."

"And if you try not to?"

Vincent was quiet for a moment and then finally he let out a breath, "Unbearable pain. It can be broken with enough fighting, we just never had the chance."

"Why didn't you ever try to break out before?" Sephiroth had actually been curious to why they had never made a plan to escape before. They had two members of AVALANCHE and one of the best Turks, technically two Turks, and yet they had stayed there a year.

"We were ordered not to."

The General nodded, still trying to grasp onto the whole situation. His eyes wandered over to Cloud, who was still passed out on one of the other beds. It was evident that the last year had taken a toll on him – his face looked slightly sunken in, and his muscles were withered down to almost nothing. Sephiroth had to ask himself many times how they had capture the blonde, seeing as he was one of the most powerful men in the world, and he always came up short. He thought back to the Advent event, and the Cloud that he had fought then, and the Cloud he was looking at now – they looked like completely different people.

He glanced back over at Vincent and then thought for a moment, "Do you think that a small shock would disable it?"

"It's possible."

Sephiroth nodded, "Alright, then let's get started."

* * *

_It was dark outside, despite all the lights pouring out from the windows from bars, and from the streetlamps. There were few cars that passed, mainly because no one in this area could afford one. The people who were walking down the street seemed to have their own business, and that was fine, because he had his own business as well._

_Rufus Shinra was walking down the sidewalk of the Slums in Sector Six. He had just turned the tender age of fifteen, and even though he knew he shouldn't be in such an area, due to his stature, at that moment he didn't care. He wore a black long trench coat, and he had his hair in his face. He didn't want to be recognized, and to his luck no one seemed to be paying much attention to the teenager._

_He had been walking around for hours, and even though it appeared as aimless walking, he did in fact have a set destination in mind. The part that wasn't going his way though, as the fact that he didn't exactly know where his destination was, other than the fact that he knew it was in the slums. _

"_Get. The. FUCK. Off me!" A voice broke through the thoughts that were starting to swarm in the teenagers mind, and even though he knew it was none of his business he stood there for a moment, curious to what might be going on. He was about to continue walking when he heard someone start to laugh. _

"_Man…isn't he a sight?"_

_Rufus felt his stomach drop and then decided to step into the alleyway. He passed a huge trash bin and a few piles of trash before he saw a group of men crowded around something. Rufus placed his hands in his pockets, narrowing his eyes at the scene and staying out of their sight. He felt his fingers grip the cool metal of the gun that was in his pocket, and clenched his jaw. _

"_Yeah, he's pretty like his momma." _

_The teenager narrowed his eyes. _

"_Too bad that's over with." _

"_Hurry up, I want my turn."_

"_Get the FUCK OFF ME!"_

"_Shut up kid!"_

_The harsh noise of flesh hitting flesh hit Rufus's ears and he could have sworn he heard someone snap. He shook his head and started to back away, it wasn't his business. However, the last comment made his skin crawl._

"_Just be cooperative like your momma was boy." _

_His blue eyes snapped open and without thinking about it he stepped forward out of the shadows he had been concealing himself in and pulled the small pistol that was in his pocket out. He didn't say a word, he just shot at the group, and a blood wrenching scream filled the air. They all turned to face the teenager suddenly, most of them wearing the same confused expression. A puddle of blood started to form around the groups feet, and while some of them kept their eyes on the teenager, some of them couldn't keep their eyes off of the corpse that was now on the ground. _

"_Listen! We're just having fun-" One of them shouted, pushing their way through the small crowd. Rufus narrowed his eyes at him, and without giving it a second thought he shot the man dead in the chest. _

"_What the fuck?!" A gruff voice hollered. "Who the fuck are you suppose to be?" A big man broke through the small crowd, holding a boy by the arm."This is our business." Rufus raised an eyebrow at the man and let his eyes fall on the victim of the whole incident. _

_The boy couldn't have been any older than Rufus. He was skinny to the point that he looked lost in the clothing he was wearing. His hair was a devilish red that was spiking all around, giving him a chaotic look. It was his eyes that Rufus found the most interesting, they were a deep turquoise that looked so emotionless and dull that he had to remind himself that the boy was alive. His hands were shaking uncontrollably, and suddenly Rufus felt a small amount of pity for him. _

"_Come any closer, and I'll slice him open." The man screamed. He stuck his hand in his pocket and quickly opened a switchblade, he grinned as he put it in front of the boy's throat and even though this really wasn't Rufus's business, he didn't want to walk away._

_Rufus shook his head then sighed at the men in front of him. They were such sad excuses for life; it was actually quite annoying that they actually thought that they had the authority in the situation. He grinned at the man, and without warning he pulled the trigger once again. The bullet hit the man dead in the head and he dropped to the ground, leaving the boy standing there. His eyes widened and he looked at Rufus and then glanced around him frantically, like he wasn't sure where to go from there. _

_Rufus waved him over, his gun still pointed at all the other men, daring them to move. "Come." He said, his voice venomous as is always was. _

_The red head listened without hesitation and walked over and stood beside Rufus, his eyes trained on the ground. Rufus was debating on whether or not letting them get away with their lives, so he decided to ask the boy beside him something;_

"_Did they kill your family?" He said calmly, his eyes fixated on the men in front of them. He didn't know exactly why he had even walked back in the alley when he heard the scream, and he still didn't know why he was even bothering on helping the kid, but he supposed it had something to do with the mother comment. It was poor timing on their part, but today happened to be the day his mother's death anniversary, and that was why he was in the slums; looking for her grave._

"_Yes." He whispered, his face pointing downwards._

"_Did they harm you?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Alright then." Rufus said glancing over at the kid then back at the men. He merely gave them a sick sweet smile and pulled the trigger on every last one of them, not flinching when they met the cold hard pavement. They were all groaning and moaning, and he thought seriously of shooting them a second time around, but decided against it and put it back in his pocket and turned to face the boy. _

"_Name?" Rufus asked as he started to walk. The boy followed, with his head still pointed down._

"_Reno." He mumbled._

"_Reno what?"_

"_I don't think my last name matters anymore." He said with a small shrug. His voice was very velvety even though it seemed so weak. He was walking with a slouch in his shoulders and one of his arms limp. Rufus noticed that his nose was bleeding and that he was actually very beat up. There was a few seconds of silence before the boy spoke again, "What's your name?" He asked quietly, there seemed to be a large amount of curiosity in his eyes, and even though he was trying to give off the vibe of being nonchalant, Rufus could tell that wasn't the real case._

"_Rufus," He answered evenly, "Rufus Shinra." He wasn't surprised to see the amount of shock on Reno's face, and was actually slightly amused by it. "You need medical attention." He said as he looked over Reno's appearance one more time._

"_I'm fine." Reno answered quickly, casting his eyes over to look at the passing building. Rufus couldn't get over how closed up he seemed, and had to wonder what exactly had happened to him._

"_No you're not. Listen, just take the help and shut up." _

_It was silent after that. It seemed comfortable, but all Rufus could think about was Reno. He wanted to know who he was, and what happened to him. It was strange, because usually he couldn't care less about anything that didn't involve himself. They reached a small bus stop and Rufus walked over and sat down. Reno sat down beside him, his head was tilted forward and he stared at the ground. _

"_Why is someone like you gallivanting in the streets of a place like this?" Reno mumbled, bring his eyes to glance over at Rufus. _

"_I had business to take care of." He answered, looking at the red head and noting all the scaring on his neck. _

"_I can't afford medical attention." The red head finally said, shaking his head slightly. "Thanks for saving me though." Reno was about to stand up when Rufus stopped him. _

"_I'll pay for it." Rufus shrugged. "What's the point in saving someone if they're just going to walk around in pain anyway?"_

_Reno looked like he wanted to say something, but ended up just sitting back against the bus station bench. It was silent for a long time, and finally when the bus showed up and they were about to walk onto it, he looked at Rufus and smiled. "Thanks, yo."_

* * *

_I hope that this chapter was enjoyable. I actually really liked writing it. I know that the coldness between Rufus and Reno is strange, but I feel that under the circumstances that it's how it really would be. I also hope that everyone enjoyed and understood the decision that I made to make Rufus revert back to his old attire. I thought the reasoning made sense._

_But please, leave a review because I love the feedback and I always take it to heart. :)_

_The next chapter will be up soon._

_-Crimson_


	8. Chapter 8: Some Nights

_Here's chapter eight, I hope you enjoy it. I really hope you liked last chapter as well! It didn't get many reviews, I actually only got one, but a lot of people viewed the story as a whole. But that's alright! Hopefully more people will review this time. _

_I also need to give credit to__** City of Dis**__for helping me with the story. He helped me find a different way to break the connection. Thank you! You're awesome dude. :)_

_Please review!_

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Eight – Some Nights

Blue eyes stared at each other as Rufus Shinra finally finished his prepping. He looked at himself in the mirror, and even though he had seen himself this way his whole life, it felt oddly strange. His hair was slicked back, and even though his forehead was visible he put enough makeup on it so no scars could be seen. The white suit clashed with the black dress shirt he was wearing and for once he could say that he looked like his old self. He put his cologne on and then glanced over at the pile of clothes that were on the floor.

However, he wasn't sure whether he wanted to look like that. He wasn't sure if he wanted to _feel_ like that.

For the past three years, all he had wanted was the ability to go back in time and change that day. He had wanted life to go back to how it had been before, and of course no matter how much he tried to fool himself into thinking that maybe, just _maybe_ he would be the same one day – it was nothing more than a small lie that he kept telling himself to stay alive. But now, he was in a place where if he could just get himself together, maybe it could be possible. Maybe if he just tried, and just forgot what happened – he could go back to being who he was.

That could never happen.

He grabbed his cigarettes off the sink and shoved them in his pocket. His hands lingered on his weapons and slowly he picked up both of his pistols and situated them so they were on the inside of his suit. He left his knives where they were, not having any way to conceal them properly. He glanced at himself one last time, and even though he knew the face in the mirror, he couldn't help but think it wasn't the same one. It was merely a shade.

Rufus Shinra tore his eyes away from the mirror, feeling numb, and then slowly made his way to the door. He opened it and then walked into his old office, the feeling of déjà vu hit him and he tried to shake it off. He walked over to his desk and stared at it for a moment. The ashtray was still there, and surprisingly he saw that it hadn't been emptied. The phone still sat at the top left corner of the desk and the calendar that Reno had gotten him as a 'Office warming gift' was still sitting beside the small lamp in the right corner.

He thought back to that day, and slowly he watched the events play out right in front of him. He saw himself talk on the phone with Tseng, he saw himself turn around and look at the snow, and then finally he saw the glace break, and that was the last thing he could recall other then the frantic footsteps that were coming down the hallway.

_You have the eyes, they're just a little more mature since the last time I saw you._

His hands started to shake, and he felt a strange sensation rumble through his chest. He hated thinking about those eyes – those cold, glowing blue eyes. He started to feel so angry that he had to clench his fists together so the shaking would stop.

_You're not like they said you were._

_Rufus Shinra, if you want any form of faith again you'll follow me._

_You'll see, in the end you'll be the one who dies, while I walk out of this place._

He couldn't stop the constant flow of memories that started to flood through his head. He closed his eyes abruptly; the outside world suddenly seemed too harsh.

_I am so happy to see that you're alright._

_You don't have anything to say?_

_What the hell happened to you?_

_Welcome back._

_If they die Rufus Shinra, you will be no better than the people who took them._

_Are you back to that? Telling people what they want to hear so they'll leave you alone?_

He couldn't take this anymore. Who was he trying to fool? Nothing would ever be the same again. He would never be the same again. There was no way Rufus Shinra could ever look back and even hope that he'd be the same person. In all honesty, he wasn't sure if he wanted to be.

He started to throw everything off the desk across the room, breaking the lamp, ashtray and even the small little glass figurine that Elena had given him. He flipped the desk over and kicked it into the wall. He picked up the chair and then threw it at the desk so hard that he saw some wood chippings fly off. The shaking started to get worse. He glanced over at the huge window that had been repaired and right when he was about to walk over to it, he felt someone wrap their arms around his whole body, encircling his arms to his sides.

His mind went into such a state of panic that he didn't care who saw him try to throw whoever it was off of him. His mind flashed back to the day that he had been taken, and he all of his rational thinking was gone. He struggled against whoever it was; trying to shake his shoulders and break their grip. His breathing started to grow hysterical, and finally when he couldn't get free he felt hot tears stream down his face. He went limp, and slowly, whoever had been holding onto him lowered him to the ground.

Rufus slowly turned around after a few seconds of just sitting, and saw that Reno was looking at him with wide eyes. He felt embarrassed immediately, and when he tried to open his mouth to speak nothing came out but a cracked breath. The tears were still falling and even though he knew he was safe, he couldn't shake the feeling that had settled over him.

"Rufus, it's just me, yo. It's alright." Reno whispered, keeping his hands on the ex president's arms, "Just breathe."

He shook his head, "I – " He thought back to his earlier train of thought, and then glanced down at his appearance. "I can't do this." He finally managed, and even though he didn't want to admit it, he had to. "I can never be this person."

Reno didn't say anything, he just kept his hands on Rufus's shoulders, and finally when the ex president started to calm down he spoke. "No one expects you to be." The red head smiled lightly and then glanced around the destroyed office, "You don't have to be the same person, you don't have to prove anything, and you don't even have to be here if you don't want to be." He stood up slowly, and brought Rufus up with him, "You don't have to wear that if you don't want, and if you don't ever want to step foot into this office again, you don't _have_ to. You don't have any obligations. Just do what you _want._"

Rufus stared at the other man, and wasn't quite sure what to say. Earlier Reno looked like he hated him, and now here he was comforting him. He glanced down at the white suit he was wearing, and then sighed. This wasn't him anymore, at least not at that moment. "Thank you." His voice was quiet and despite the fact he had been crying moments ago, he felt oddly calm.

"No problem, yo." Reno glanced around the room again and then scratched the back of his head, "I'm sorry about earlier…I didn't mean it."

The ex president felt a small smile tug at his lips, "It's fine."

Reno looked at him then, "I'm actually glad I came when I did…I thought you were going to break the window." He laughed, and Rufus decided it was best not to comment on it, because he actually _did_ have the intentions of breaking the window. It was quite, and even though Rufus had calmed down he still couldn't get the tight feeling in his chest to go away. Reno glanced at the door, and then back to Rufus, "Elena and Rude want to see you."

Rufus nodded, and then took a look at himself, "I'm not sure if I want to wear this when I see them."

Reno looked him over and then smirked, "We can switch. I always wanted to see what I'd look like in white."

"No."

"Awww, come on, yo."

"Absolutely not."

"That kinda of hurts, you don't think it'd look good on me?"

Rufus rolled his eyes and then shook his head, "I can't show favoritism." He thought back to when he had told Cid that the Turks weren't his anymore, and after spending some extra time with Reno, he realized that _that_ was a joke.

* * *

"Did it work?" Tseng's voice broke through the heavy silence that had fallen over the group, and even though Sephiroth had known the man for what seemed like years, he wasn't used to him talking.

Vincent looked at them, and then closed his eyes and fell over. The ex General would have found it more comical, however the circumstances ruined the fact. He let his cat like green eyes glance over at Cloud, who was once again sleeping on one of the beds. Just looking at the other man made the heaviness in the room grow.

When the blonde had woken up the first time, it was almost like looking at an enraged animal. Sephiroth wasn't sure whether he was supposed to avoid a fight, or take one in open arms. The decision was almost made for him, until the silver headed man realized that Cloud had lost almost half his strength. He had quickly grabbed the blonde's arm, tore off the ribbon off and casted sleep on him.

That was where they were at now.

It had taken awhile to figure out what to do, and finally he had grown slightly impatient and walked downstairs and asked for a fork. When he came back up the stairs, he had shoved the fork to Tseng and then walked over to take his place leaning against the wall.

The fork was in the gunslingers hand, and finally after a few seconds passed his crimson eyes shot open and he sat up. He wasn't surprised that the shock didn't have any life threatening effects on the gunslinger. They had all done worse things that shove a fork into an electrical socket. He immediately looked at Sephiroth, who had his arms crossed over. "I believe it worked."

He raised an eyebrow, "How were you able to come to that conclusion?"

Vincent sat there for a moment, and then finally he answered, "My head hurts."

* * *

"Just breathe, yo. They won't bite." Reno's voice broke through the small panic that had started to settle over Rufus, and even though he knew the red head was trying to be helpful, he just wanted him to be quiet.

Rufus had finally just put back his other clothing, and even though he felt strange walking through the WRO looking like a refugee, he dismissed it when he remembered Vincent Valentine and Yuffie Kisaragi walking around in their strange attire in the past.

They were standing in front of the door that led to the Turk's office spaces, and even though Rufus had been there plenty of times, he felt like he didn't know where he was. His heart was beating so fast that he thought that it might explode, and before he could change his mind Reno opened the door and pushed him in.

He stepped in and caught his balance, shooting Reno a glare when he walked up beside him. The red head shrugged, "Sometimes you just need a push! I heard that in a movie once."

"I'm sure they meant that metaphorically." Rufus said blankly, resisting the urge to punch the man next to him.

"No, I think they meant it – "

"Shut up Reno." Rufus said while shaking his head. He couldn't go through another session of bantering with the red head.

Reno was about to respond, but someone spoke before he could. "S-Sir!?"

Elena's voice squeaked through the small talk that the other two had created. Rufus immediately looked her way, and tried to prepare himself for the panic and anxiety that he assumed was about to hit him. It didn't come though, instead his heart softened at her appearance; her blonde hair was longer, hanging a few inches below her shoulders. Her brown eyes looked glossed over as she stared at him, and before he could react she had walked over and wrapped her arms around him.

"I'm sorry sir. I'm just so happy to see you!" Her voice was muffled against his clothing and when she pulled away he saw that the smile on her face was something he hadn't really seen on anyone else yet. She laughed nervously and then shook her head. "I – um. That was inappropriate, I apologize."

"Geeze Elena." Reno mumble, "You think you could have been any more dramatic?"

She shot the other Turk a glare, "Shut up."

Before he could stop himself he started to chuckle. He shook his head at her; the panic he felt earlier seemed to disappear. He wasn't sure what it was, but for whatever reason seeing her face didn't send him into a strange state of hysteria. "It's fine." He said as he glanced over as Rude walked into the room. He let his eyes fall onto the woman in front of him again, and it was then he thought back to the comment Reno had said in the helicopter.

_He put a ring on it._

He glanced down at her left hand and saw that there was in fact a ring on her hand. He looked up at her then, and then he felt the guilt in his stomach return.

"Welcome back sir." Rude's voice broke through the thoughts that started to fill the ex president's head. He held a hand out to him, and slowly Rufus took it, feeling strange.

"Thank you." He finally managed. He let his hand fall back to his side, and as they all stood there awkwardly. He glanced over at the door, and had to keep himself calm as a realization hit him.

Tseng wasn't going to walk through that door.

"Beer!"

"It's three o'clock in the afternoon!" Elena protested, "You aren't serious?!"

Reno looked at her and then looked at Rude, "Beer?"

Rude nodded, "Beer."

The red head then looked over at Rufus, "Beer?!"

The ex president thought for a moment, and then nodded. "Beer." He was going to need one with the direction his thoughts were going.

* * *

_I know the chapter wasn't really amazing, but it was still a chapter. I didn't get a lot of reviews last time, kinda kills the motivation. That's alright though._

_Please though, if you get the chance please review. _

_I'll post the next chapter in a few days. There will be more going on in that one. A lot more Sephiroth, and a lot more Organization._

_Also, I've just posted another story. It's called "Fields of Gold." It has Rufus, the Turks and AVALANCHE in it. It's not so much like this, it's more of a drama. But please, if you get a chance I'd love for you to read it. _

_-Crimson_


	9. Chapter 9: Can't Go Back

_Here's the next chapter! I hope you enjoy it! :D_

_Also, I have a story up now that's called "Fields of Gold." The main character is still Rufus, and it will center on his relationship with people after he finds out he's sick. Please go take a read if you have a chance. _

_Please review if ya can! :D_

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Nine – Can't Go Back

"Let. Me. Go." Cloud's voice was quiet, and despite his deflated figure he still held the same eyes and enough strength in him to make the two people holding him back struggle. Sephiroth stared at the blonde while Vincent and Tseng held onto both his arms, trying their best to restrain him.

The silver headed man was on the other side of the room leaning against the wall, not because he was scared of the blonde, but because he didn't want to have to hurt him. He was all for a healthy fight, but with Cloud in the state he was in, it just didn't seem fair.

Cloud had woken up just as Tseng had confirmed that he thought that his connection was broken after passing out from the shock. He had stared at Sephiroth and in a matter of seconds he had been on his feet and ready to fight. Thankfully Vincent and Tseng had reacted quickly enough to grab him, and now they were standing there staring at each other.

Cloud's blue eyes stared right into Sephiroth's green ones, and despite the fact that the ex general knew he should try to be civil, he couldn't shake the feeling of _wanting_ to rattle the blonde's cage. He just made it so easy. "Your friend's say hello." He said after a moment of silence.

"You son of a bitch!" He tried to break free of the duo that were hanging onto him, "You have _no_ right to talk about my friends." The ex General saw despair fill the other man's eyes with the mention of friends, and he almost felt guilty.

He was right; he didn't really have a right to, but despite the fact he couldn't help but want to aggravate the man in front of him. Sephiroth looked at Vincent and then Tseng, having a small idea. "Let him go." Vincent gave him a puzzled look, and Tseng merely shook his head. "I'll duel you Cloud, but if I win you have to stand down." He kicked himself off the wall he was leaning on, and then took a step forward.

"No."

"We can either put you back to sleep, or you can accept my deal." He raised an eyebrow, and he could see the gears in the blonde's head turning. "You beat me twice haven't you? What's the harm?"

"Three. I've beaten you three times." Cloud said while taking a deep breath.

Sephiroth thought back, and realized the blonde was right. He had beaten him three times, once in the reactor, once at the northern crater, and then with the advent incident. He grinned at the man in front of him, "Alright, shall we go outside?"

* * *

Rufus wasn't sure if beer had been such a good idea.

They were all back at the Turk's lounging area at the WRO, and even though it had been nice to just hang out with his Turks, it had also made him more aware of the fact that Tseng was gone. He had volunteered to be the designated driver once they had made their way into a random bar, mainly because he thought the other three deserved to relax.

"I haven't seen him relax so much since before you were gone." Elena's voice broke through his thoughts and he looked over at Reno, who was passed out on the couch snoring lightly. "He was so worried, we all were, but he was especially. We had already lost you once before…so none of us were sure what to think."

Rufus nodded, and tried not to think about the previous time he had been kidnapped while he had geostigma. He looked at the woman who was sitting in front of him. She had changed so much, and even though she still had the same nervous core, she had relaxed quite a bit. She had joked around with everyone, and what made Rufus feel terrible was the fact that he knew that all she wanted to do was ask him where Tseng was, but she hadn't and even though he was glad, he also felt like he owed her an answer.

He owed everyone an answer.

"I'm…I'm glad that you're back sir." Her voice was quiet, and when he looked over at her he saw that she had her brown eyes casted down, "I don't know what happened, or where you were, or who did it – but I'm glad you're back." He could see the tears she tried to hold back, and he felt like he was being stabbed. "I just wish…I just wish I could have prevented it."

He stared at her, and had to replay what she said over in her head. She was upset because she couldn't do anything about it? He tried to think of something to say, but just the thought of her blaming herself made him speechless.

"If we would have gotten there sooner, then we could have saved you. Then Tseng probably wouldn't have gone missing." Her voice cracked at her fiancé's name, and the ex president lowered his gaze to the ground. "I just – everything happened so fast. We were afraid to leave each other's side, because the question of 'who's next' would always haunt us. Reno was the one who wasn't scared – he went all over the world, and when we asked him why, he said 'if I do get kidnapped, I'll know where he is, and then I'll break out.'" She laughed and then shook her head, "I don't think he ever realized that if they had Tseng, Strife, and Valentine as well, there was no way he'd escape."

Rufus looked over at where Reno was sleeping, and he felt a small tug at his heart. He had _wanted_ to get kidnapped. He wanted to save him and everyone else so bad, that he had been willing to get captured. The idea made Rufus angrier than he expected, and he took a deep breath to calm himself down. He shouldn't have been surprised that Reno would be so reckless, but just the idea of the red head being captured and put through what he had gone through made his blood boil.

Rufus looked at Elena, who was staring at Reno as well. She looked so much older, and so much more mature than what he remembered. She and Tseng had finally made it official that they were dating, and he remembered thinking that it seemed strange. It was almost as strange and Kisaragi and Valentine – however it made sense; they completed each other in ways that the other one lacked. Elena glanced over at him then, and raised an eyebrow.

"Is everything alright?"

Rufus nodded, "Yeah." He looked over at Reno, "I just can't believe how much things have changed."

"I agree." Her voice was quiet, and when he looked over at her he saw that her eyes were cast down. "A lot has changed." She looked up at Rufus then, and she gave him a small smile. "It'll get better though, it already has."

Even though he knew her words were half hearted, he couldn't help the warm feeling fill his chest. Part of him couldn't understand why they all cared about him, he had put them through so much, and he still was. He had sent them on missions that had probably scarred them, and even though he wouldn't admit it, there was a part of him that was no better than the Organization.

* * *

"That son of a bitch!"

The scream echoed through the caverns, and despite trying to stay calm he couldn't stop himself from shaking from anger. He stood in front of the cell that had held his prize possessions, and he had to clench his fists together so he wouldn't attack someone.

"There was nothing we could do – we – he was too strong –I, I'm sorry"

"Shut. Up." The other man standing next to him quickly shut his mouth.

"He will pay." His voice was quiet, "I promised that I would protect this planet, protect the Goddess and I won't tolerate him interfering." He took a step back and glanced at all the other people he had captured, they were staring at him with wide eyes, almost like they couldn't fathom who they were looking at. "All of you!" He glanced at all of them, "You will feel the pain that you have caused the planet – taking its life. You will feel the Goddess pain and you _will_ give it back what belongs to it."

"I – I thought you were dead." A small voice whispered, and when he glanced over at who was addressing him he smiled. An old man stood there shaking with his hands clasped on the bars containing him.

He walked up to him slowly, "Do I look dead?" His voice was quiet, and when he was not more than a foot away from the old man he smirked.

"You were a part of SOLDIER – you're supposed to protect the people."

"I protect the planet." He smiled at the old man and then turned behind him to his guard, "I have no use for him, get rid of him now." He started to walk away, but was stopped in his tracks when the old man spoke again.

"He was here; he's already shown you that he's not scared. He's mocked you because he knows you're weak. He walked in your territory and saved some of us – he'll beat you. Sephiroth will protect us."

He turned around and glared at the old man who seemed to be mocking him. "You think that maniac will _save_ you?" he laughed at the thought, "He's nothing more than a washed up, pathetic psychopath." He couldn't stop his anger from rising with the thought of Sephiroth. Protect? That was a joke – that man didn't care about anything but himself. "He'll pay too – out of everyone, he is the one who's caused the most pain, and I promise I will make him feel every ounce of what he's caused." He began to walk away, "Kill him, now."

A scream filled the caverns as Genesis Rhapsodos walked away, and even though he felt his skin crawl from the sound, he wouldn't stop until the planet was cleansed of all that had hurt it - all that had stolen from it.

* * *

He didn't want to say that he had been overconfident, but in the end he knew he wasn't going to lose. Sephiroth looked down at the man who was lying on the ground, looking up at him with a sword directed at his throat. The silver headed man couldn't help but like the sight a little bit, and he grinned at the blonde whose glare never faltered.

"Enough." Vincent Valentine's voice broke through the think tension that had settled over them. Sephiroth took a step back and sheathed his sword, the smirk never leaving his lips.

Cloud stood up shakily, and looked over at the gunslinger. "You can't expect me to accept this." His voice was quiet, and he then looked over at Sephiroth, whose arms were now crossed over his chest.

"We have to, for now." Vincent's voice held no real emotion, and he then turned his back toward the duo and walked back toward Icicle Inn.

Sephiroth stared at the man who was standing in front of him. Slowly the smirk fell from his face, and he felt something stir in his chest. Cloud was staring at him as well, his breathing was rigid and after a few moments he realized that the blonde was shaking.

"You've taken so much, and you don't even care." Cloud's voice was quiet, and he cast his eyes to the ground. "I used to think that maybe you had just gone insane – but look at you, you don't care about anything." He laughed and then shook his head violently, "You've hurt so many, and you haven't even thought twice about it.

Sephiroth continued to stare at him. All feeling of triumph was gone, and he was left feeling cold. His cat like green eyes blinked and he broke his eye contact. He looked at the mountains that were off in the distance, and forced himself not to feel.

"You killed my family, you burned my home to the ground…" Cloud's shaking was worse now, and his blue eyes were shinning with a new found vengeance, "You're the reason Zack died." Sephiroth felt a small tug in his chest with the mention of the other SOLDIER, "You killed Aerith." His voice was barely audible then, and Sephiroth kept his face blank. "And you have the nerve to 'save' me, and then spit in my face."

The ex General took a deep breath, and brought his eyes back to look at the blonde. He thought over all the things that had just been said, and he found that he felt oddly numb. "Do you think that I wanted to do all those things?" His voice was quiet, but steady.

"I don't care whether you wanted to or not, you did." Cloud took a few steps forward, "I don't care why it happened, I don't care what you wanted, because I was left with nothing! I couldn't do anything." Cloud's voice cracked, "I don't care who sent you, you will always be nothing but a monster."

"Have you ever stopped and considered that it wasn't me who did all those things?" Sephiroth gritted his teeth, trying to keep his composure. He wasn't used to all the emotions that had started to swirl around in his chest – he wasn't used to feeling.

Cloud stared at him, exasperated. "What the fuck does that even mean!? I watched you kill! I watched you destroy everything!" He took another few steps toward Sephiroth, to where there wasn't even a foot separating them "I watched you scream and holler 'Mother, Mother' over and over again to an entity that isn't even your fucking mother!" Cloud's voice was reaching new heights. "You took everything from me."

Sephiroth narrowed his eyes. Snow was starting to fall gently, and after a few moments of staring at the blonde who was staring at him, almost like he was waiting for something. The silver headed man blinked, and slowly he took a step forward, walking past Cloud and toward the Icicle Inn. He didn't have to deal with all of that, he had come back to save the planet, and that was what he would do.

He wasn't there to deal with actions that he had no control in.

"Sephiroth."

He turned around then, and looked at Cloud who was looking at him as well. They stared at each other for a few moments, almost as if both of them weren't aware of what to do next.

"If there's any part of you that has humanity left, I hope that one day you feel how you've made me feel. I hope you lose everything, and I hope that you have to watch helplessly as it happens." The blonde's voice was even and steady once again, and he turned to face the other man completely.

Sephiroth grinned, and then shook his head, "What you're unaware of Cloud, is that I already have." He turned around then and continued to walk toward the Inn. He shut all of his emotions off, and walked inside, making himself forget about the whole conversation.

Sephiroth still had humanity, but he had shut it down. He didn't want to feel.

* * *

_I know that not a lot happened, but I really felt like I needed to get out who exactly was the head of the Organization. I also hope that you liked the scene between Cloud and Sephiroth, because I kept going over it, and I really think that something Cloud has needed is to explode and for once just get everything he's felt out._

_I'm sorry this took so long. I'll work on the next chapter tonight, and try to get it posted soon. Moving and job hunting as really been consuming my time. Sorry!_

_Please Review~_

_-Crimson_


	10. Chapter 10: Be Still

_Alright, I know a lot didn't happen last chapter, but I'm going to try to make this chapter very long, and very emotional. Let's see what gets addressed shall we? _

_And thank you for wishing me luck on the job search! I really appreciate it! :)_

_Please review if you have a chance! :D_

_-Crimson_

* * *

_Redemption_

Chapter Ten – Be Still

Rufus shook his head, "I don't think it's a good idea." His voice was void of emotion, and even though he had been over this at least ten times with Reno already, it didn't seem that the president of the WRO was going to take it lightly. He looked at Reeve, who was sitting behind his big oak desk, hands crossed and looking back at him.

"Please," Reeve smiled sheepishly, his voice was calm but Rufus could tell by the dark circles around his eyes that he was exhausted. "I really think it'll do the public some good to see you, to see _someone_ who has survived."

The ex president suppressed a sigh; his patience was running thin and despite him understanding Reeve's point he didn't really care. He knew that the people needed someone, anyone to give them hope but Rufus didn't want to be that person. He didn't want to instill hopes and dreams into people when he wasn't sure what was going to happen. He just didn't want to be the cause of disappointment, not again.

"It seems cruel to give people faith when it might be put into a lost cause." Rufus replied, shaking his head slightly.

"It wouldn't be a lost cause if you would explain yourself." Reeve's eyes were narrowed, and slowly he stood up. "I understand you need time. I understand that whatever happened to you was scarring." He walked in front of his desk and then leaned back against it. "However," he continued, "you are being extremely selfish."

"Excuse me?" Rufus's voice was quiet, and without realizing it he clenched his fists together. Selfish? He understood? The ex president clenched his jaw tight and tried not to make it to visible that the other man was getting under his skin.

"You're being selfish." Reeve stated matter-of-factly. "You were hurt, and you were abused, that much is easy to see but what you fail to realize is that you're not the only person who's being affected by this." He threw his arms out, indicating to the situation as a whole. "I've tried to reason with you, and I'm getting sick and tired of treating you like some psycho case. There are people missing Rufus, there are people who are missing their mothers and fathers, there are people who are missing their children!" He sighed and then shook his head, "There are people who are missing their friends." His voice was quiet then, and even though Rufus wanted to lash out at the man in front of him, he found that he was stunned.

No one had spoken so bluntly to him yet.

"You of all people should be able to empathize with the people who have been captured – you were one of them."

"You don't have a remind me." Rufus said while trying to shake off the feeling that was growing in his chest.

"Well it looks like I have to, because you're not understanding this situation." Reeve snapped, "Now listen – you will go to this damn party that I've planned, you'll dress in a white suit and you'll smile because this is bigger than just _you._" He took a step forward then to where he was only a few inches away from Rufus's face, "And after all of this you'll tell me where everyone is."

Rufus was more than taken aback. He had never seen Reeve so serious before. He stared at the other man and felt anger rise in his chest. Who did Reeve think he was telling him what to do? He didn't have to listen to any of this – he came here to decline the offer, not to be pushed around.

"It was nice seeing you Reeve." Rufus said as calmly as he could. He took a step back, but before he could even turn around completely Reeve spoke again;

"Will you stop this pathetic act?!" He shouted, "You're better than this! You're better than sitting here and brooding over things you can't change – you know better than anyone that the past can't be changed, so why sit here and keep avoiding it!? What happened happened, and I'm sorry it did, I really am. But I'm not going to keep tiptoeing around you, you're a grown man and you have to start acting like one."

Rufus stopped dead in his tracks and narrowed his eyes at the man in front of him. He should attack him. He should scream at him. He should choke him. So many things ran through his mind at once, and that was the only reason he didn't act on any of this thoughts, there were just too many. His heart was racing, and an aching in his chest started to surface. His mind was going so fast that the only thing he ended up being aware of was that he was still staring.

"You don't know anything." Rufus said cooly.

Reeve laughed, shaking his head, "You're right! I don't know a damn thing because you won't open your fucking mouth and tell me what I need to know!" His voice was starting to rise, "This is ridiculous." He scoffed, "Just go, I don't even care right now."

Rufus took a deep breath trying to calm himself. Anger was flooding through his veins and despite him wanting nothing more than to scream, he kept himself calm. He stood there for a few more moments; he kept his gaze on the floor, not wanting to lose his resolve by looking at Reeve.

He was right.

Reeve was right, and after everything that had been said that was what made Rufus the angriest. He was acting like a child, a coward. He wasn't helping anyone by acting like the way he was, he was only making things worse.

"Fine." Rufus finally muttered, "I'll be at your fucking party." He looked up then to see that Reeve had gained his composure and was smiling at him.

"Good because it's tonight." Rufus didn't even have time to respond before Reeve was walking behind his desk and sitting down again. "Don't forget, white suit and smile!" His voice sounded pleased and he grinned at Rufus, who was still trying to wrap his mind around the sudden mood change.

He glared at Reeve and then turned on his heel toward the door. He grabbed his phone from his pocket when he made it into the hallway. He was so angry that he could barely get his words out when Reno answered the phone;

"Bossman?"

Rufus took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose and walked toward the elevator door, "When did Reeve turn into such a monster?!" He exclaimed as he mashed the down arrow on the wall.

Reno laughed, "He's always been passive aggressive, yo."

"I wouldn't use passive." Rufus muttered.

"You got played didn't you?"

"Played?"

"Yeah, yo." There was some shuffling on the other line, and a second later Reno started to laugh again, "He played you like a piano, Reeve's always been good at pushing the right buttons."

"…"

"Bossman?"

"…."

"Oh no."

Rufus took a deep breath, "That seems to be the case." He finally managed as he tried to keep calm. It was quiet for a moment and finally the elevator doors opened and he sighed, "Can you get a white suit ready for me?"

"Uhhhh…sure, I guess? Why?"

"We have a party to go to."

* * *

Sephiroth stood with his back against the wall. He had his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes closed. It had been a day since him and Cloud's confrontation, and in that short window of time Cloud hadn't said a word. They were all still at the Icicle Inn, and he was waiting for them to formulate a plan, because at that moment he was barely educated on the situation.

He understood that Genesis was back and that he was kidnapping people with mako in their bloodstream. He also understood that he was implanting chips in their heads to control them. However, he didn't understand why – something else he couldn't understand was how Rufus Shinra of all people was able to escape. He would have guessed that Strife and Valentine would have escaped, but it was the total opposite.

"I want to go home."

Tseng's voice interrupted Sephiroth's thoughts, and he opened his eyes to look at the Wutian man. No one else said a word, they all merely stared around the room, almost like they hadn't heard the Turk in the first place. Sephiroth looked at Tseng and saw that frustration started to tug at his features.

"I'm leaving."

"We need to make a plan." Cloud said as he looked up at Tseng, who had just stood up.

"You can plan all you wish." Tseng said, "I have no obligations to." He looked over at Sephiroth, who was still overlooking the scene before him. "Thank you for saving me." He started toward the door, but was blocked by Vincent.

"Wait." Was the only forth coming reply from the gunslinger.

"We can't just leave." Cloud said as he stood up as well, "We have to stop this."

"You can if you wish." Tseng curtly replied. He took another step toward Vincent, "Now move before I make you."

Sephiroth raised an eyebrow; he couldn't even begin to understand what the blonde was thinking. "Wouldn't regrouping with your other teammates make more sense?" he drawled, not really understanding why the two AVALANCHE members seemed dead set on not leaving. Cloud glared over in his direction, but ignored him.

"I agree. Now let me through." Tseng said while looking at Vincent, who was still perched in front of the door with his arms crossed.

"You want us to leave all those people?!" Cloud said while shaking his head, "I won't."

"Then you can stay and play hero." Tseng replied while glaring at the blonde, "I'm not going to get myself killed over your arrogance."

"Cloud." Vincent finally said, "Sephiroth is right, we need to regroup."

The blonde scoffed and then clenched his fists together. Sephiroth watched him carefully and couldn't fathom to why he felt so deeply for things that he didn't have to be a part of. He kicked himself off the wall and toward the small group that was gathered by the door.

"Those people need help." Cloud managed through grit teeth.

Sephiroth glanced at him and stopped himself from rolling his eyes. "What good will you be to them dead?" His voice was cold, and even though he knew that nothing he said would truly matter, he couldn't stop himself.

"Cloud." Vincent pushed.

"Fine!" he blonde exclaimed, "Fine."

The ex General would never understand why he was so angry. Considering that Cloud was going to be able to see his friends again, Sephiroth had assumed he would be more excited about that. However, of course the blonde was more concerned with playing the hero – he had always loved playing that role.

Which is what Sephiroth believed would get him killed one day.

* * *

"Now don't I look amazing?" Reno exclaimed while looking at himself in the mirror, "Oh yeah, tonight will be a good night!" He had on a blue suit with a black dress shirt underneath finished off by a red tie. Rufus was sitting in one of the chairs in the private dressing room and shook his head. "I'm so glad you changed your mind, yo." He threw a fist in the air and then grinned, "Tonight shall mark the first night Rufus Shinra has acted like a human being since his return!"

Rufus took a deep breath, trying his best to ignore the rant that Reno kept going on. He glanced over at Rude who was sitting beside him. "Some things never change." He said while cracking his neck.

"Some things never do sir."

Elena walked out of her dressing room then, "So?" She asked while looking at herself in the mirror, "I dunno, I think it makes me look…too young?" If Rufus wasn't so stunned he probably would have laughed that she was still self conscious about her age.

"Damn!" Reno hollered.

Elena was wearing a black strapless dress that hugged her hips and chest. It had a slit on the left leg and a silver pendent on her left hip. She had on silver shoes that wrapped around her foot and ankle and a diamond bracelet on her right wrist.

"Not to young?" She asked while spinning around slowly, still looking at herself.

"Hell no!" Reno said while walking to stand beside her, "Look at us babe. I look awesome, you look awesome, we should just seal the deal now and walk over to that courthouse."

"Shut up Reno." She groaned as she walked over to stand in front of Rufus and Rude. "Sir?" She asked while glancing down at herself, "I know it's not really…practical, but I can still fight if I have to!"

Rufus shook his head, "You look amazing Elena." He smiled at her and had to stop himself from laughing, "I doubt there will be any fighting, just enjoy yourself."

"Suck up." Reno chimed.

Rufus smiled at all of his Turks, as long as he had them then the night might be tolerable.

* * *

When Rufus said that the night be tolerable, he had no idea what he had been talking about. He stared at all of the people who had gathered into the enormous room that Reeve had set up, and he couldn't remember the last time he was surrounded by so many people. He was standing in the entryway, finding it impossible to even move. He had done what Reeve had asked, he had put on a white suit and even though his appearance made his skin crawl he dealt with it.

He had to admit, it was almost nice for people to look at him in shock rather than horror. He was leaning against the huge doorway, and even though he had told Reno that he would be fine, he wasn't so sure that was the case now. He took a deep breath and then shook his head.

He was Rufus Shinra; he was more than capable of putting up a front.

His hair was slicked back like it used to be, except a few strands still found their way to his face. His white suit wasn't as elegant as his old one, but it stuck out in a crowd. It was only a black dress shirt, a white dress jacket and white slacks. There was no way he'd be able to make it through the whole night with a tie around his neck so he had neglected to even attempt to put one on.

Overall, Rufus Shinra looked like Rufus Shinra – maybe a slightly milder version.

"Rufus?"

The ex president turned around and almost lost his footing when he saw Tifa Lockhart standing there staring at him. He had to keep himself from gawking at her, mainly because he hadn't expected to see her. She smiled at him and walked closer, "Ms. Lockhart, I didn't know you were coming."

She shook her head, "Please, it's Tifa – Ms. Lockhart makes me feel old." He nodded at her, and continued to watch her, "I didn't either, but Reeve asked me last minute and since Marlene is with her dad, I figured I would come. Most of AVALANCHE will be here."

"I see." He said lamely, "You look great." He finally managed.

She was wearing a deep blue dress that went all the way to the floor. It had one strap over the left shoulder and it hugged her waist and chest. The material looked as if it crossed over one another and at the bottom it was lose, with material looking like it was flowing out from the top of the dress. Her hair was in loose curls, framing her face. He couldn't believe how beautiful she looked, the last time he had seen her she didn't look like she could have filled out a dress.

"Thank you." She said while glancing at the room they had yet to step into. "You don't look bad either, you look more familiar." She laughed lightly and then shook her head, "Did Reeve you put up to this?"

Rufus shrugged, "Reno said he played me."

She laughed again, "He does that."

He nodded at her, and couldn't keep the small smile off his face. He felt enormously better now that she was there, mainly because she had always had such a soothing presence. He thought back to the last time he had seen her and he still couldn't believe how much she seemed to have cheered up. She was still skinny, but compared to a few weeks ago she looked wonderful.

"So," She said, breaking through Rufus's random thoughts, "Shall we?" He nodded at her and then held out his arm for her. She grabbed it gently and slowly they walked in.

"Oh my…it is him."

"Wow."

"Who's he with?"

"Rufus Shinra…in the flesh."

Rufus heard all of the comments as he passed by, but he tried his best to ignore them. He gave people a small smile as he passed them by, and even though he felt his nerves starting to dwindle down he continued on.

"Bossman!" Reno's voice broke through all the other ones that the ex president was hearing, and he was more than relieved. The red head ran up to them and grinned, "Ahh, now I see why you ditched waiting. Hey Teef!" He smiled at her and then raised an eyebrow, "Well damn! Look at you!"

"Don't even Reno." She said while rolling her eyes.

"Save me a dance Teef, we're gonna be the highlight of this party."

"Isn't it supposed to be more of a gathering?" She sounded amused as she shook her head. She unlinked her arm from Rufus's and then crossed them across her chest.

"It's more of a 'Hey look, it's Rufus Shinra' party." He looked at Rufus and then nodded, "You cleaned up well I see. I bet the ladies will be allllllll over you." He drawled out his words and then laughed, "Have you seen Elena or Rude yet? I didn't come with them because I was supposed to meet you at the entrance." He pointed an accusing finger at Rufus.

"Did I steal your date Reno?" Tifa teased.

Reno rolled his eyes, "Oh please, you couldn't even if you tried. Someone tried that once and even after years he made his way back to me."

Rufus blinked stupidly and then felt his chest tighten. What did that mean?

Tifa laughed, "Dear God Reno have you already had a drink?" He waved a noncaring hand at her, "The party hasn't even officially started yet."

"I don't need an excuse to drink babe, I just do." His blue eyes wandered around the room and Rufus suddenly felt strange. He stared at Reno for a moment and then tore his eyes away. He turned to look at Tifa who was looking around the room as well.

"I'll be right back." He said suddenly. He felt hot and the air felt stuffy. He looked at Reno and then at Tifa, "Sorry." He took a step back from them and then turned to look at an emergency exit. He walked over to it quickly and pushed it open. The fresh cool wave of air hit him and he breathed it in quickly. He was on the side of the WRO building standing on a fire escape.

"Sir?"

Rufus had to stop himself from jumping. He looked over to see Elena leaning over the railing of the fire escape, a cigarette between her fingers. She was wearing the dress she had picked out and had her hair pulled up in an elegant pony tail. She still had her bangs out and she had some loose hair framing her face.

"Oh." He walked over to her and leaned over the railing as well, "It was stuffy in there."

She nodded in agreement, "I've been here for about an hour and a half, I had to help set up some last minute things that Reeve forgot." She shook her head, "I swear his head is all over the place lately." Her voice faded and she cast her eyes to the ground.

"He seems very stressed." He commented while cracking his knuckles and glancing at the city lights. The sight was different than what he remembered, not as many lights were on and not as many cars were driving through the streets.

"Mostly everyone's here." Elena said while tossing her cigarette on the metal floor and it smashing her foot on it. "Reeve really out did himself, two ballroom sized rooms, side by side – this should be an interesting night." She sounded tired and she placed her chin in her hand.

Rufus nodded in agreement. He couldn't shake the feeing in his chest – it wasn't his usual guilt or anxiety. It was something else completely and he couldn't place what it was. He took a deep breath and then shook his head, he needed to calm down.

_He made his way back to me._

The feeling only increased when he thought back to the comment and for whatever reason Rufus felt sick. He sighed and then looked over at Elena, who seemed to be in her own little world as well. He thought back to the small conversation again and closed his eyes. That could have meant a lot of things – they had known each other since they were fifteen years old, they were practically brothers.

Brothers – brothers can love each other. Rufus nodded to himself, that's what it was. He meant it in a brotherly way. He sighed and the feeling in his chest started to loosen up. Rufus had always made his way back to his Turks, and that was all the comment was.

"We should probably go inside soon." Elena said as she stood straight up, "I'm sure people are looking for the guest of honor!" She winked at him and then made her way over to the door. He nodded at her and followed her toward the door. She opened it with ease and the two of them walked in.

Rufus felt his insides twist and turn when he laid eyes upon all the people that had arrived, and were still arriving. He glanced around the room wildly and felt his hand start to shake. He wasn't used to this; he hadn't been around so many in so long that part of him didn't even remember how to act. Elena was still next to him and when he didn't move she looked at him with concern.

"Sir? Is everything alright?"

He nodded, "Yeah." He took a step forward, "I just can't believe how many people fit in here." They walked forward and Rufus was still in shock at all the people.

"You'll fall back into it." Elena said as they walked through all the people, "It's not something you can really forget." She winked at him when he looked over at her, and finally they made their way over to the tables that were set up in the other ballroom sized room.

"Yo!" Reno ran up to them a moment later, "Good, Reeve's about to start his 'announcement'" he rolled his eyes and then looked at Rufus, "Don't worry, there's no speeches, just a spotlight, you stand up, wave, smile, sit down and then drink and dance the night away baby!"

Elena rolled her eyes at the red head, "Listen, one of us needs to stay with him the whole night, you know people are going to bother him." Rufus had to stop himself from saying he could take care of himself.

Reno nodded, "Well, you're suppose to go on the 'stage' and tell everyone to sit their asses down."

"Got it." She started to walk toward the stage and Rufus glanced at Reno who was staring at her.

"Ya know, sometimes I hate that they got engaged before he was taken." Reno watched as she walked away and then sighed, "Cause now she's even more depressed than what she probably would have been, and she won't let anyone cheer her up."

Rufus shook his head, "You're terrible."

"I didn't mean it like _that._" The red head laughed, "But, now that you mention it…"

"Don't." the ex president warned. Reno laughed and then waved him over to follow him. They walked through rows of tables until finally they made it to the largest one, which was already accompanied by members of AVALANCHE and Rude. Reno led him over to sit in between him and Rude and finally when Rufus sat down he gazed at all the faces that were sitting at the same table he felt like he was going to explode.

Yuffie Kisaragi was sitting a few seats away beside Tifa. She had cut her hair a little shorter, but was still long enough to frame her face. She had on a green dress that cropped from the left leg down. It had a strap on each shoulder and had a sweetheart neckline. She looked over at him and caught him staring and she narrowed her eyes at him and turned away quickly.

This night was going to be more than awkward.

* * *

"So Mr. Shinra, how are you?"

Rufus wanted to stab himself. If Reno would just leave his side he probably could, quickly before anyone realized it. He stood there, listening to what felt like the hundredth person talking to him. He didn't know any of their faces, yet they all seemed to know him.

That was stupid, of course they acted that way, he was Rufus Shinra.

"I'm fine, thank you." He smiled at the plump lady who had been talking to him, "Actually, can you excuse me?" He apologized to her and quickly walked away, he had to get away from there. He was going to explode. He had done what Reeve asked, he had smiled and waved at everyone when the spotlight was on him and now he was trying to deal with the people who wanted a personal conversation.

"Wait, bossman!" Reno was right behind him and finally when Rufus managed to walk out of the enormous entrance he turned around to look at the red head, "Damn! You walk fast!" Reno bent over and placed his hands on his knees and took a few deep breathe, "Thank Gaia, I was sick of all those people."

Rufus nodded but didn't say anything. He stood there for a moment and then looked at his Turk who was still trying to catch his breath. He had an overwhelming feeling to be alone, and being around Reno wasn't exactly that.

"Reno, I'll be right back. I forgot my phone in the Turk's lobby."

"I'll go get it, yo."

"No, really – I'll be fine." Rufus gave his Turk the familiar look of authority and then stalked off before he could argue with him. He had to get away from there. His heart was racing and he felt like he couldn't breathe – the farther and farther he got away from it all, the more the feeling subsided. Slowly he walked to the elevator; he mashed the up arrow and took a deep breath.

He couldn't understand why people had been so pleased to see him. There had been people who had pestered him about where he had been, but his Turks were quick to intervene when it was needed. He had seen so many people gawk at him, and so many people smile at him. He knew that they were slightly happy to see him – not because it was him, but because he was a survivor. Reeve was right, it didn't matter who it was, they just needed to see someone, anyone.

It just so happened to be Rufus Shinra who instilled hope into them.

The elevator doors opened and he walked inside them. It took a few moments for them to open again and when they did he walked out of them slowly. He walked past all the empty offices and couldn't help but think it was weird for the place to be so void.

He reached the Turk Lobby moments later and opened the door slowly. He would only stay a few moments, he just need some alone time. He walked in and closed the door behind him. He was about to walk toward the couch that Reno had slept on days before when someone spoke;

"Rufus." Rufus jumped so quickly that he almost tripped. He pulled his gun out so fast that he almost dropped his gun. He had hidden it underneath his jacket before the party and had it pointed in the direct of whoever had called his name. He looked at the person for a moment until finally his mouth formed a big 'O'.

Rufus blinked, unable to form coherent thoughts. He couldn't believe his eyes. His hands started to shake and slowly he lowered his gun. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. He must have had one too many drinks because what he was seeing wasn't possible.

"Tseng?" His voice was quiet, and as he stared at the figure in front of him and he felt his stomach drop. He felt his eyes burn and overall he felt a panic he had never felt before. He took a step forward and waited for the image to go away, but it didn't.

"We have a problem." Tseng stared at Rufus with clouded eyes, and before Rufus could ask what he meant someone else made their presence known.

"Good evening Rufus Shinra."

Rufus shook his head. No. No, this wasn't happening. None of that was real. He hadn't just heard that, not again. He stared at the two figures in front of him and heard his heartbeat in his ears.

"Sephiroth."

* * *

_Alright! 12 pages! I hope that made up for all the times I didn't upload. I know some people didn't like the emotional side of Cloud that I made happen last chapter, but I can't help it, I like it. So I'm sorry for those of you who don't. /:_

_Anyway! I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I tried to make some things happen because a lot hasn't in awhile. Anyway, please review when you get a chance! :)_

_Well, I tried to post links to the girls' dresses but I can't figure out how to do it without it going away. Soooo, if anyone knows how to do that and wants to tell me so I can post them in the A/N next chapter, please tell me! :)_

_Please review! :D_

-Crimson


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